Tear stained shirt
expressions bare
mourning the loss
drop to knee....
[scared]
Looking glass
reflection seen
running circles
a world within....
[destiny]
Hard to bear
life unfair
passing dreams
my everywhere....
[belief]
Tired races
burning faces
Waiting days
dreams away
cutting places
[relief]
Author notes
I don't know who I am anymore, sitting here in front of this window, watching the world pass by .... it just appeared so I let it be. silent screaming! Transcend All
A contest entry
- dark writes (just...make me feel something) by my--i u--k i.
542 points, ended January 28, 2008, 24 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Can you relate?
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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INCREDIBLE!!!
I so understand these emotions. You have expressed the depth of despair and the disconnected from the world. I so often feel I am so alone in a very big, cruel world, that I don't think I belong in. GREAT JOB ON THIS PIECE!BLESSINGS, Doris
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It is hard sometimes to face our losses in life, and to move on with our lives now. That is what we must do - move forward, but never forget. We must deal with the here and now as well. I too often feel that life is just passing by, while I helplessly watch. I too have regrets and painful memories. Life is really unfair, but we try to make the best of it. I don't mean to sound like a lecture. Thank you for sharing this with us. I hope that it makes you feel better to write it down. Congrats on the trophy!
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I too sit before the window and watch the world go by. I only go out if my husband takes me and then suffer from anxiety attacks. I could feel all your pain within your write. I am sorry that you have to go through life like this too. Wonderful imagery and emotion throughout your amazing write
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great write
I can empathize with the emotion in this poem. I think You are right on your profile. I don't care for ignorant and bias people either. It just hurts others to treat them unfair. Good luck in the contest!
And welcome to People with disabilities.
Melanie
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When you stop trying to find out who you are that is when you will know the most. The man who is strongest is the man who stands most alone.
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It is truly hard to fathom loss. I was just thinking of a cousin who passed away in October. I miss him so and still find it hard to believe he's gone. Still find it hard to believe he won't be calling me on the telephone. It's hard. There is intensity here in each jolted line! I see that it is simply a thought process that you allowed to spill on the page. I hope the heart heals soon. I felt this! The best to you in the contest.
Much Love & Many Blessings ♥
Renee
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Transcend All
Thanks for reading it I think! The odd thing, you have no idea what these words meant to me at that moment. The meaning, the emotion and the serious ... well anyway it has touched more people than not. I don't always understand or like what someone sees or puts down, that's ok. But if I'm going to comment on what they took the time to share, it wouldn't hurtful. People write in that moment because they are compelled to and have to.
Namaste' -
This left me with literally no emotion.
It's just a series of descriptive words without the meaning behind them.
Blah. Give me more -
Wow, the emotions in this are so raw...you can really feel the pain.........Extremely emotive. The short lines are not so much me, but I think in this case they are very appropriate.
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YES
i like it.
a damn ton.
like. fuck yes. -
Sooooooooo Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.
You are breaking hearts with this one.
The emotions are so raw and the pain is undeniable.
Life could be painful at times, I cry everyday,it's my weapon of choice.
You stand at the window, I look in the mirror and try to remember who I am.
Best of luck in the contest, and in your personal life. -
This is sad I wish that I could help you in some way love you loads hang in there much love always
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