If I slipped between your lips...
ran the silk of who I am over your tongue
allowed you to breathe the bounty
of my bouquet
would you sink to your knees
drinking the vintage of my soul?
In a list
A contest entry
- . by Aurora Ceres.
700 points, ended January 20, 2008, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-writes & Fresh Writes Welcome Here! by LadyUnique.
300 points, ended January 17, 2008, 65 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Save Me! (My Favorites ONLY!) by Celticmoon.
700 points, ended February 29, 2008, 18 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Your Very Best!!!!!--contestant vote by TabbyCat.
600 points, ended May 8, 2008, 39 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrites; short poems only. by deadcolor dreams.
900 points, ended April 6, 44 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PREWRITES THAT HAVE WON BRONZE OR SILVER ONLY by liquidmindforever.
400 points, ended May 31, 99 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 36 of 36
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Lovely
Dear Poet,
Thank you for entering my contest: PREWRITES
FOR BRONZE & SILVER WINNERS, ONLY with your submission A FINE VINTAGE.
Metaphorical. Visual. Clever. Sensual.
Well done.
Best wishes
Until then
stay
liquid
finalist
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Oh wow. This is just beautiful and powerful. Like a punch to the face- in a good way.
This is great. Thank you for your entry and good luck!
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This was so simple yet beautiful.
"ran the silk of who I am over your tongue"
man, that was fantastic. -
Wow! Such an impact with so few words. Very sensual. I enjoyed this read. Best of luck to you poet in this contest
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Yes, this is beautiful.
A succinct write.
On a personal note, just a suggestion. Have a plain dark background(Dark blue or black) with white font and left align. Adjusting the presentation will make this piece a more delectable write above expectations.
Your decision, my opinion.
Keep sharing your gift.
HENSLEY
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Forever I will. A fine vintage indeed. Although your poem is worthy of Gold I must choose Bronze and I hope I've answered your question
Peace in light and love
Noah -
I really liked the use of metaphor and figurative language throughout, sensual doesn't really seem to sum it up! It captures a particular time using an appropriate brevity - good luck
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This is excellent, such soft flow and beauty in brevity...wonderful to read and I love the metaphor...
Best to you!
mystic
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This is a lovely piece. bringing the sensual succulence of food and drink into a gentle notion of other sensuality allows the imagination to drift into passion and heat
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Sometimes what is implied is more powerful that that which is actually said This poem is a fine example of that Great
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Very sensual. This is great.
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I like this, short , sweet, sexy.
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Wow...this is really sensual...without being overbearing. Well done.
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Sis this is by far my favorite piece of yours!
The flow s this screams with sensuality and passion.
I soooo love this!
I cannot stress that enough!
Thank you for entering.
Best of luck to you!
Blessings
Bel
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the simplicity of this is succulent
thank you for your entry and best of luck
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The whole time these images popped into my head responding to each part I read. I have to say "drinking the vintage of my soul" could be easily misinterpreted but nonetheless it's still a fantastic poem.
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Very sensual but tastefully done. you imply but don't actually say. I like it. thanx, conni
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Wow!
*takes a minute to cool off*
Very sensual, teasing and inviting. Um...we were talking about wine, weren't we? Great imagery and nice play on double interpretations!
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this is interesting and beautiful all in one I enjoyed reading this thank you for sharing you are a talented writer
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Very sensual. I love the simplicity and flow but feel its a little needing more - like you are just getting warmed up - but still has a very fluent and dainty effect.
Thanks for entering.
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So few words evoke so much meaning. Sometimes i think the simple statements carry the most weight.
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Great! Good luck, best of luck!
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how sweet. good luck in contest.
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The simple elegance of this piece can't be understated. It is absolutely WONDERFUL!!!
I adore poems that allow the reader to absorb it on many levels, and this one has it all. The ambiance, the flavor, the aroma and the mood flow effortlessly into mind & spirit...a true sign of an outstanding work of art.
Magnificent work!
Best of luck in the contest!!
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I think my dear you would have them come a running lol, this is just perfect. Good Luck Love, C
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THIS IS JUST SO LOVELY AND PASSIONATE!!!
Only if I could find a lady who could make me feel this way and one who is around my age. This is so touching and sweet.
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excellent
Very romantic and beautiful. best of luck in the contest.
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Wow!!
Oooooooooooooooh Love the images You have brought forth along with the Heat of Your words
to feast upon...
HOT HOT HOT!
Wooooooooo Hoooooooooooo
Thank You for sharing Your Talent also Zing!!
Many blessings to You in the contest Beautiful
Best wishes always
and much love~ Desire~*~
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Wow! I am blown away by your talent Such a sensual piece, very enticing! Bravo to you and good luck the contest this one has winner written all over it!
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Wow... um... wow.
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I would be drunk on the beauty of you'r words alone
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This is one of your more rapturous pieces. Quickly and incisively you present the reader with a wash of sensations and flavors. Beautifully done.
Love, Tom B.
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BREATH TAKING
Smooth as silk and just as tasty...would you sink to your knees drinking the vintage of my soul...sighs...forplay for the tongue winner wrote all over it
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SIGH!!!!!!
Oh My!!! What a great read!! This melts one's heart and makes them feel just wonderful!!! I love this!!
Best of luck in this contest!
and love
Nyetta
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Beautiful!!!!! Such a comparison is awesome.
Great job..Good luck in the contest.
Soulful Woman
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Very nice. Short and to the point.
Very nice comparison of sampling wine and the sampling of another. I am one who believes that woman are like fine wines and they only get better with age.
Keep writing.
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