Peepholes in the dark
let an unfamiliar light peek through,
casting a world in an otherworldy, ominous glow.
One peeping tom after another,
gradually open their eyes,
and prey on the silent dark pit
below,
beneath their blue sky.
Pathetic.
Dreadful.
Disturbing.
Sad.
Inside this pit
lay hundreds of thousands of disease-infested moles,
blinded by the glare of a thousand peeping eyes
screaming out in frustration and agony,
running chaotically all across the lonely ground,
biting each other's ears off,
hoping to survive,
and find the right tunnel out
before they all collapse,
and the pit swallows them whole.
Pathetic.
Author notes
Inspiration: #1 "In between the moon and you, angels get a better view of the crumbling difference between wrong and right." ~Counting Crows "Round Here"
I figured that in between the moon and the ground is the stars, where these angels lay, and they are the only ones that can see the disgusting world below. They see it as pathetic, but all the moles want is to survive. What is right? What is wrong? I don't know, that's what I got from it. I tend to take things a bit abstract
(I hope this is okay. If it isn't, just tell me and I can fix it)
Bye!
ModernXTimes
In a list
A contest entry
- Double the Lyrics by Morrigan Trinity.
525 points, ended January 31, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
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Comments
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It's awesome!!!!
Very good. You have a fresh perspective on the lyric. I wouldn't have expected something like this. I loved:
"Inside this pit
lay hundreds of thousands of disease-infested moles,
blinded by the glare of a thousand peeping eyes
screaming out in frustration and agony"
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Well done! You write the dark genre well. This poem kind of makes society look pretty bad. Great flow, vivid imagery!
Love,
Amera♥
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thank you for the comment. It means so much coming from such an accomplished writer.
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