I clutch the hopes tightly
corked in me
by the stranded crew,
I felt a tinge
on departing with them
would this be my last meeting,
But I have to brave this quest
for them,
I sea saw my way,
tired and weary I have reached
fighting currents
ready to devour me,
now on this shore I lay
hoping my emarald body
will shine in someone's eyes.
Author notes
#5 - Write from bottle's view... at the mercy of the sea
In a list
A contest entry
- 145th Contest by Tarja.
450 points, ended January 11, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This personification shows the bottle as carring and possessing a sense of purpose as well as determination. Brave too. A number of the best human qualities.
Well worded.
jjj
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Thank you , your comment just gives more life to my bottle...Thanks Judith..Here is a
for you.
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I love that you used the picture, nice touch. This was really awesome... there could be a little more imagery I think but the word choice and the emotion was great... I especially liked a specific line:
"hoping my emarald body"
That was great... really brought the bottle to life.
Thank you for entering and good luck.
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This is very nice
I wish you the
best of luck
in Tarja's contest.
RedwingSpirit
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Thank you so much dear...
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This is great. It reminds me of a life battle thansk for sharing.Goodluck to you in this contest much love
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Thank you.
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