My wings are fading fast,
time plucks their feathers one by one.
Soon I will not soar on updrafts,
but gather each lost feather and
keep them under my pillow.
In a list
A contest entry
- feather by Utok Bulinaw.
410 points, ended January 10, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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very clever
very subtle piece.doesn't sound like your writing is fading this little piece flies all by itself.
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I like the gathering of feathers here. It gives emphasis to the fading or wasting away. The metaphor of time in this one is indeed creative. Thanks for entering.
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Wonderfully great!
great write mate, plenty of emotion and i love how much thought it gives me, and how much emotion that flows from it
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this is a beautiful write thats full of emotion and room for the reader to think. well done and best of luck
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Awww, i will just have to grow you new feathers. Maybe youcan he;p me fly because I think my wings are broken.
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A profound, sad, contest entry...This I pray is not how you really feel physically......you know I value you...very much....So wonderfully written...Your metaphor, and imagery is beautiful
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If your wings are plucked "One by one" wouldnt it be 2 plucks? I think you meant feathers..I could be wrong. Good Luck In your contest.
[♥]Nicotine.
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