Long ago, when I drank too much,
Said too little, and morels were few.
I woke in the morn’, or, perhaps, it was noon,
Knowing not, of what I would do.
I took a sip of whisky, then the gallon whole,
And, with the bottle of rum, I did go.
I heard the clash, and I picked up a sword,
Too drunk to see, 'twas wooden bo.
Still, I stepped to the fray,
Between the battle, I grinned.
Set the rum at my feet,
And my fight did begin.
They circled and swayed,
Turning every which way,
Trying to deceive,
But it was now that I played.
Two on my sides,
On the opposite ends,
Lept for my throut,
And, with a swagger, I defend.
The first pierced the bo,
The second sword, I punch.
Dropped back, and jabbed the first’s gut,
Then dropped down low, on the hunt.
Quickly dodging the blade,
I went to a knee,
The bo above my head, swung,
And, his head, I did cleave.
Realized, ‘twas a wooden thing,
Though he still hit the floor.
So I picked up the bottle,
As I headed in for more.
Author notes
Suprisingly, this was a true story. Not expecting anyone to believe that, but it's true. I once drank too much, and I still love to swordfight. They were in the front yard, and decided to attack when I came out with a beat up wooden sword. Even as drunk as I was, a gallon and a half of liquor, I managed to beat them both, even though they had blades. That was fun. It's better that I don't drink that way anymore, but I miss the random battles I faced.
A contest entry
- Where be your army? by Pixie Girl.
400 points, ended January 17, 2008, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
The old days...
Comments
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This was great. I see why you won silver. Lucky they do swordfights there. Here they just shoot you or jump you with no less than 4. I've been fortunate enough to never face more than 5 guys. That one got my jaw broke with a bowling pin... and yea alcohol was there too. lol
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This certainly gives new meaning to the words 'drunken brawl'
I sit here and shake my head because only you would pull something such as this and live to tell the tale.
Bel
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lol, you're insane.
see? alcohol is bad..bad kyle...bad...lol
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Bad?
I won.
With ease.
And, aye...
I'm far past insane.
Thank you, though, Niko.
-Saint
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