…great dog of war
trampled the wisdom
of temples ‘pon graying pillars
trapped the faceless monk;
empty red hats hang
from belted girth
with lost memories
of fishes and men;
breastplate armor
preened proof of ruined worlds,
fire eyed hound of pestilence
and grief, breathing fury;
Oh, ‘twas innocent hands
raised blood glass window,
lifted the crimson contain;
done in kind attending
most urgent whisper,
from deep golden hunger.
A contest entry
- What Do You See Now ?? (Round 5) by just mercedes.
550 points, ended January 11, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Thank you for your entry to the contest, and your knowing response to the prompt. I have read enough of you to recognise your voice, even when disguised, and again I am awed by your ability to go right in to your thoughts, and bring out a fine work. My favourite lines - /with lost memories of fishes and men/ which to me has a Biblical resonation, and the final two lines, which suggest to me that you see me clearly. Thank you for this great work, poet.
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Very good use of metaphors. Not sure why, but your poem made me think of the invasion of China in Tibet.
Well done!




