How old will I be when I am free?
Don’t push so fast, I need to move slow.
Are you trustworthy? How can I know?
The anger is deep and scary in there.
Set it free? Do I dare?
It would be easy to drop it and say I don’t care.
“Don’t trust too much,” my heart reminds, “Beware!”
So hard to share the pain of the past,
Spectrums of feelings so deep and so vast.
How old will I be when I am free?
Confusion runs rampant in this heart of mine,
Wanting to pretend, everything’s fine.
Don’t push too hard, I’ll push you back.
Stubborn and strong, that I don’t lack.
How old will I be when I am free?
I guess that time is up to me.
A contest entry
- A Good Old Poem, from younger years by Violinstrings.
650 points, ended November 15, 2008, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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i like this
you use rhyme but it is not so obvious because
the words flow
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Past pains captured well here
Indeed a good poem from your back catalog, full of sad emotions captured here for all time. One can feel the pain behind this write, and it's good to be able to reflect back on the past, especially when it's written down in the form of poetry. Thanks for sharing this sad poem.
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It is a pitty there is so much sadness here, Patty. I love your writing but i can also feel the deep heart felt emotions that lies in those words. Although i was never put through what you were, i had similar pains and rages for what i had gone through in the home. Sometimes your poetry makes me cringe. I wish i could take all your pain away from you and allow you to experience life without that fear and sadness behind you. Love you heaps, my friend. Well written.
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Thanks so much for your words of kindness. This poem was written quite some time ago, early in my healing. I love to look back at my writing and I can see how much I have grown. It is always a struggle, but I have learned a great deal and know I would not be who I am today without the struggles I have had. Your compassion is greatly appreciated, as well as your thoughtful and heartfelt comments. Blessings, to you, Patty
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