The energy within you,
Invoked as it swirled,
brought into existance,
It created our world.
Put into motion,
an image appeared,
one thought of energy,
powerful and revered.
Merged with the energy
dwelling on the earth,
negatives and positives
created mans birth.
Positives creates positives
negatives the same,
united, creates conflict,
emotions inflamed.
In the slums of Dehli,
thirteen year old girl,
creates in her mind
as her energy swirls.
Full of knowledge and wisdom,
that came from within,
creates thoughts of love,
eradicates sin.
One child,
on a journey alone,
with wisdom to guide her,
her awareness had grown.
She sees a solution,
cure for mankind,
it is not of matter,
it is of mind.
Author notes
everything begins with one. (the energy within us is our souls given by our creator) the one and only
how would yo improve this poem
Comments
1 - 42 of 42
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Brilliant!
I am learning to accept this energy that is negative and positive, like the 13 year old. Wisdom is the word that has occupied my mind in the last two months, so this subject has been a hot topic of the season within myself.
Love it my chomi..I can read it over and over to remember that it is about the mind.
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Very beautiful, I loved this. Deep and as the reader below said, profound. I love how you ended this one... such a hopeful and positive note. Going in my bookmarks.
Blessings my friend, such lovely poetry comes from your heart.
Amy
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Wise-Wonderful-Profound...
Outstanding composition on spiritual and ontological subjects well said in poetic expressions... "Mind Over Matter" flows and glows with a wise message.
In respect and appreciation,
Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
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Interesting display of your thinking.
Well written. -
this is a really strong and evvocativ write
i enjoyed it very much
thanks
T
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Bravo
I love the words to the pic...powerful in truth and His majesty. Blessings.
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Excellent
Who is the thirteen year old girl in Delhi?
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Hummm...
We are not what we think we are, but what we think,
we are. You are right on the thoughts. Wrong roads come from stinkin' thinkin'. Enjoyed
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Great stuff...
Inspiring & uplifting...
Bold, confident & full of hope...
Great narrative, rhyme & flow that made for a compelling read that enthralled throughout...
Keep up the good work...
Well done!!!
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Yes, thoughts are things to be, which can be a sweet dream or a nightmare. I like the first stanza, how we are brought from divine energy, in the beginning and now. The ideas develop momentum, there is much information here. Stanza 6 - genius.
Many blessings to you!
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Wonderful - full of hope. Well Done!
I love these lines:-
'Positives creates positives
Negatives the same,
united, creates conflict
Emotions inflamed.'
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An aware scientist once pondered the poor handling of this deluded world of human talent. He said the next Einstein might be a thirteen year old girl somewhere in the slums of Dehli, who will never be allowed a chance to develop her outstanding wit. Your poem brought back the memory to his words. In addition talent is used to improve mechanisms to maintain and increase control and cause destruction. It reflects the incredible ignorance of those responsible for life on this planet. But all these gadgets will be dwarfed by the power of the mind, one circumstance will free it from the shackles keeping it confined and ineffective.
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Your pen bleeds poetic bliss all over this page, what a remarkable poem well done !!
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i absoutly love this poem its groovy i can feel the song in my soul, its very good vibes, i love this keep up the great work
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Great
Very strenghtening.
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wow that is really cool! i love the last stanza. that is so neat! i love it!
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Good
YES !!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Mind Blowing is an Understatement!
Woweeee this hits home big time, fabulous descriptives, and graphic and poetic artistry.
Love the way you enchant and keep the flow throughout, I was hooked.
All of it so true and profund as well.
Imagery is fantastic.
Very well done it was a penomenal trip!
Poetic Hugs,
Kaz
Kazytc xx
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I decline..
..to do either also, because I love it as it is! beautiful thoughts expressed here and powerfully inspirational to boot!
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Excellent!
Can not add or detract .You have captured the moment of creation,and a little nun who motivated the world with her love for those less fortunate!
Beautifully done.
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THIS IS PURE POETRY, SHOULD HAVE A GOLD TROPHY THERE.
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Again Brilliant
I love your thought process and the way you put pen to paper (as it were) -
Great read,
I don't agree with everything in the poem, but i thought you wrote it beautifully. I did agree with most of it. good luck in the contest.
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Not bad ...
but a period at the end of each stanza does not constitute punctuation. Hopefully you will fix that before the contest ends. -
That was very interesting and bright.Good luck on my contest
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Wonderful words
I love the way your mind works and inspires beautiful words.
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Right on the money
I wish more people would understand how their state of mind is what ails in this era of materialism we live in.
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Nice
I love the story line and the perfect rhyme. For some reason many do not like rhyme. But not I. I wonderful enjoyable & enlighening read. & Happy mothers day
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Hello Pisces Rainbow. I have read a fair few of your poems, and I applaud you. The questions you ask and the thoughts you evoke, not just in this poem but in all I have read are one's that all souls should ask and think about. I wish you well on your journey. Regards. Ace - LightWithinMe.
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thank you very much for your kind words. God bless my friend
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Very profound... full of insight. Yes, i totally agree; if we harness our mind's potential we could change the world we live in. It takes allot of courage to choose not to be an effect to the cause of suffering. To open the mind completely to compassion, giving, replacing hate with love selfishness with kindness, force with wisdom. This is an excellent message... one to which i totally agree
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Powerful!
This piece is filled with grand themes. I've got to give this one another read to digest & make comments. I''m saving this to my DT & will get back to you. Thank you for your expression of deep pondering! Bravo for that dear one!!!
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Pisces,
each of your pieces
proves the power of mind,
the free will you exert
to inspire in kind.
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This very good. The ability lies within us all. Finding the strength and time to put into motion what must be done while the arduous task of survival continues to sap the energy of those who would benefit.
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Lovely images and thoughts. Energy is a powerful force that influences everything in the universe, combining and re-combining, changing form. Like thoughts that grow and change. And everynow and then, a spark hits, and a thought is created that changes ...EVERYTHING. Like you said "everything begins with one". Wonderful write!
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Outstanding message and verse
Wise words and beautiful metaphors, a wonderous tale and a skilled talent for sure. God Bless and keep you safe.
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true, true, true be in the earth not of it, Thats what this one makes me think of another great write, thank you so much for posting it!
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You have a way of speaking from your heart with such a talent...You will inspire many who read....
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Nice write. Putting our mind in the positive mode surely helps out in how we handle situations.
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i loved how the words flowed into each other......
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Compassionate talent which is one of mankind's most powerful is structurally and methodically destroyed by the mechanisms and (lack of) awareness that have been implemented and induced in society. The objective for creating such constructions is despicable. Millions of talented spirits never get a change to apply their talent and often die under dire circumstances. Still, in spite of this a great number continue to try to be compassionate, even if it kills them. And although the assaults of the dark are rapidly intensifying one of these kind spirits with outside help will be able to cure the diseases of mankind. Thank you for creating and sharing. Take care,
Chris
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This poem is empowering
I enjoyed this write because hopelessness and despair must be given its walking papers this write goes to the root of creation and shows the reader how things came about and how to grow from despair to a more positive outlook accepting the negative because it is necessary in the creation to bring about ONE.
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