I walked, slowly like one weighed down
My mind wading through an information overload
Each second held in too much detail
As I put some necessary distance between us.
I trawled for something familiar
For a dark spot, a paranoid thought, for fear.
I wanted to remember that there had been tension
Or that you had overstepped or underhinted.
Blanks were drawn.
The afternoon had been perfect;
More than I could have hoped for;
More than I had dreamt of.
Damn.
I skipped, lightly, trying to be subtle
As I felt a smile widen across my warm face
Soft touches still lingering on my neck
A kalidascope of coloured thoughts spinning
And each combination it came up with
Was bright, vibrant, beautiful.
A brown sofa, cream floor, white cups
And your green-blue eyes, so close
Just as I was beginning to doubt.
A grey road, the orange shop, cars, pedestrians
Then just us, as I let the moment take me.
Lingering hands, fingertips, thoughts.
Backwards glances.
Happiness.
Author notes
im under 25
A contest entry
- The year that was by Janice M Pickett.
1200 points, ended January 12, 2008, 1 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 25 and under by silverscent.
460 points, ended February 12, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - III by N e a r.
4000 points, ended February 16, 2008, 121 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I loooved the part "Backward glances"! It seemed that throughout the poem, the speaker was looking forward.. yet at the end, the stumbling stopped and things got much happier and more peaceful. At the beginning, it was rough, but then it made a turn out... that backward glance. That's what I got out from it. Excellent poem!
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Thanks for entering my Valentine's Day contest, and good luck!
M a r l u x i a
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EXCELLENT
Work of a master craftsman, handling the words and expressions like a dough, capturing moods and feelings very poetically and giving them shape to the creator's desire. A mesmerizing read indeed!
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this is a beautiful and powerpacked write. I always have such fun trying to work out who the poet is. I look for clues in the writing and this has all the qualities of a number of my favourites. Hmm not sure yet. LOL But it is truly beautiful.
Thanks for entering.
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