Hammering unfathomable progression
Ineffable fingers dissect life’s ambivalence
Removing ebullience in fluttering diatribe
Each key embellished with the cosmic Braille
Whose cipher is pied in the inheritance of genius
Yet, cinched in his sight as the mirror, masochistic
So, as time prunes the past, apathetic and mystic
Massacring the masses of ghosts, teratomous
Of movements, of portraits, ideals, allochthonous
His vast strokes of imagination are timeless
Connecting from pages made murky by ages
Forever onward into the infinite flux
Author notes
Mozart. It takes true greatness to be readily recognized by one's middle name alone.
I messed with the form/tense of some of these words so that this piece could be fluently read - I hope you don't hate me for it.
A contest entry
- The Word Bank from "H" "E" Double Hockey Sticks by Abby In Chains..
15750 points, ended January 27, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
-
Hood-wink! ;-))
I totally have to agree with leander, LOL...
This is such a great piece with really impressing vocabulary; beautiful, just beautiful!
Thanks for sharing your talent, I enjoyed reading this poem!
Keep up the excellent work!
Annie
-
Hood-Wink
Wow this is amazing!! I could see fingertips moving along the piano. Imagery is wonderful and so visual. I could almost hear the music. Keep up the amazing writing
-
Hoodwinked
Mozart was a great artist and musician. He is a little ecentric as well. His music was so beautiful and romantic, I think. -
hoodwinked!
Wordy, but in a good way. Nice visual formatting/layout. I particularly liked the last line "forever onward into the infinite flux" quite powerful is you ask me. Lovely!
-
Hoodwinked!!
Wow!
This read like one of his Masterpieces and took
me to the piano...where I could see fingers
composing music~~
Each key embellished with the cosmic Braille
Whose cipher is pied in the inheritance of genius
Yet, cinched in his sight as the mirror, masochistic
You have also been Hoodwinked by The Poetic Bandits!
Thank You for sharing Your Talent!
Best wishes to You in the contest
Many blessings too
and much love~ Desire~*~
-
You've Been Hoodwinked!
Wonderfully written, I especially enjoyed your topic, rich, vibrant and totally captivating work. Hug, Bunny
-
I forgot the clappies
-
Hoodwink!
Holy pants! I like this one
Definately the fact that I had to look up some words here and there, but that's because English isn't my maternal language and I love expanding my vocabulary 
Anyway, There's some great imagery captured within your lines, and I like that as well.
I see this is in quite a big points contest I wish you the very best of luck!
Leander -
Hoodwink! you've been hoodwinked by the poetic bandits. What a treasure this is. Filled with rich vocabulary and imagination. Just wonderful the way you use words.
-
You have been HOOD WINKED by The Poetic Bandits. This is your day in the spotlight - enjoy. This man was such a musical genius and you have expressed these sentiments very well in your poem. Great verbiage in these lines. Good luck in the contest.
-
Hood-Winked!
A powerful write. Deep expression of emotion. Extraodinary vocabulary. Good descriptives. Well crafted and a much enjoyed read.
You have just been hoodwinked by a member of The Poetic Bandits.
-
His vast strokes of imagination are timeless
Connecting from pages made murky by ages
Forever onward into the infinite flux
i usually abhor internal rhyme but you did well with it here. i love these lines the best of your poem.
and the last line you have really wraps it up. i see steve has already been around to comment, so it seems my work here is done.
well done and best of luck in the contest.
Abby -
Hate is such a strong word, I'd say, have more faith in your craft and learn what you can to better your artistry.
That being said, YEAH, I get to look up a word. heh
Nice woven detail, but feel this poem could be vastly improved, alone by rearranging words to some of the lines.
Make the poem personal, describe Amedeus, make me feel him.
Take the first two lines:
"Hammering unfathomable progression
Ineffable fingers dissect life’s ambivalence"
Unfathomable progression hammers diligently,
a dissection of an ambivalent life through
ineffable fingers,
This may not be what you want to say, but it tends to give more depth. Give me depth, let me know the turmoil or joy that Amadeus felt pounding away on the keys and calculating meter in his head.
I feel you have a solid foundation. My wish is that you will not take my criticism personally, but rather constructively for I'd love to see, through your eyes, what this late master of musical genius, had to offer.
Thank you for your entry and best of luck to you in our contest!
~Steve
Adding your comment:
1 - 13 of 13
