You can’t break what’s inside me
There is nothing left to break
It’s all been broken before
By some who don’t care
Just like you
But i'm stronger inside then you think
I've been broken but i've learned
This once ice hurt around my heart
Has turned into iron
My friends foraged it with their love
You won’t enter without my permission
I'm living strong now
Happier in myself
With a keyhole over my heart
Only those I love can get it
And for others
Just one warning
There’s nothing left to break
Author notes
# op 2 title Nothing left to break
[She's nothing you'll ever know, succumbing to perfection, lost in translation] in your authors notes,
Just so I know you've read the rules [=
i hope this is ok
A contest entry
- [Sell me lie after lie, break my heart time after time, Tell me that you love me always] by over the rainbow--x.
525 points, ended January 19, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
please tell me what you really think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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this poem says to me,people have done awful things to me but i have come thru it all stronger and wiser than b4,shows how grown up u have become
love u daughter
daddy,
ps-never lose ur inner strength
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Your words seem to simplistic for such a complex meaning. Yeah I like the ice/iron around your heart, but it just doesnt seem real to me. It doesn't really feel like you put the emotion you need to put into here. It doesn't feel real.
I like the idea behind it thought. I think that your idea needs to take a hold of the words more.
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There's a lot of strength in your words... good luck in the contest you're in. I do like this... I think you could do more with the imagery. But I love the last part about living stronger now and being happier. Things that many have a lot of trouble doing these days...
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Good write but as the preson before me said, I'd like to feel the breaking. Writing poetry is taking someone on an unforgetable journey. Giving them your experience. Your poem is the platform that I am waiting on to get aboard the train that will take me on this journey. I love the whole idea of this poem and I'd love to be taken on that journey. If you do re write this, please let me know because I'd really love to read it.
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i felt like this minus the positive aspects. I felt like my heart was a shattered vase, broken into little tiny pieces.
One part confused me though:
This once ice hurt around my heart
Has turned into iron
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I'll be honest (it's what I'm good at)
I like the poem but it doesn't stretch me enough. I like to feel every part with imagery and in your face metaphors. If it's breaking that has been done... then break the reader along with your heart. Oh and I'm not so sure on the spelling of foraged (forged?). You have a good piece, but I think you have the talent for great.
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awwwww
For on having an "iron heart" you sure are precious and sweet. I know you want everyone to believe you are hardened and cold but I know the sweet princess who is gentle, kind, and loving. Love you sweetie, Daddy
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I really liked this;
Though i don't understand why you spell break wrong all the way through && then right at the end?
Was that purposeful?
Anyways, this was really strong && emotional.
♥
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wow this is an amazing write and its so powerfully penned with emotions and just wow. well done sis and best of luck
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Such a bittersweet reflection of unrequited love.
A very thoughtful write. Happy Trails -
This was very well written. I am not sure if in the last line, you purposely spelled break incorrectly, but I thought I would point that out.
I enjoyed the positive energy that came from this poem. It was full of hope and strength that some find difficult to possess. Thank you for the message and the emotion.
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really good sis
i love you
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Im living strong now
Happier in myself
With a keyhole over my heart
Only those I love can get it
I love this my beautiful Em you always write things that make me stop to think , Best of luck in contest
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Oh this is great sweety goodluck to you in this contest best wishes and much love always
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