if there were
a bottom it’d be
the three
I was and not
am at the moment
all of it is
now and if
not I couldn’t
ever
I.
not ever
in the morning
you
drowned in.
the
pounds were
ugly on your
body and stuck
there. and
I swear it.
never
II.
never. Please
don’t take
me with you.
to the bottom,
to the bottom.
III.
she would
eat me because
I taste good
and it smokes
and chokes the
lives out of me
the middle
between dead and
deader where I
was salt
IV.
on a pretzel. and
you sunk so
fast it sunk
me with you.
my hands with you,
my feet,
my fing-
V.
ers and babies
and self
she took it
all and everything
in one day
VI.
I hate god who
held me under
as her when I
was never.
my mouth to
yours and hers
and mine since
we’re the three
I was and not
am at the moment.
the very bottom
that refuse to drown.
VII.
since we are fish.
VIII.
Halleluiah
Author notes
"My mother is a fish." -William Faulker, As I lay Dying
Um...I remembered I was still alive. I hope no one is too shocked of the news. I missed you all.
In a list
A contest entry
- so she drowns. by layla..
1450 points, ended May 11, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Wow. Very nice and cohesive imagery and meaning and how daring and creative the enjambment here is!
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the beginning of this was .. SUPER confusing but i definatly liked that. it was extreamly abstract but well put.
i think the title went very well with the content of course.
another amusing read
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This poem seems to seek the foundation of memory. It sinks down further and further into the imagination - the stanzas overlap as do thoughts the further down you go. The allusion starts with the womb and works backward from there to the three you are not at conception. I enjoyed this backwards search.
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you know, i think i understood it all even though you've confused me quite a bit.
i think your poem is the state of my mind. loved it.
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Thanks. I'm glad you have an idea of what I'm talking about. everytime I have a direction I want to go in (or a goal to reach in a piece) I always struggle with how to get there the most effeciently. I don't go out of my way to confuse people, though sometimes it happens.
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