The time is 1900's
Victorian Era
My dress is full of grandeur
with my hair spun with lace,
hands smooth as butter
eyes, on all that there is.
I am in the gardens
collecting flowers,
white gloves on my hands
with a big hat of straw on my head.
Hills and hills
I see many hills of land,
open spaces with many trees
as I glance across the garden.
The sky seems the same as now,
now is 2009, I have not displaced
myself.
Then I go back again,
I see a big white beautiful dog
named Sandy, with a cat, calico
named Ed.
The cook comes out to ask
"What shall I prepare for dinner?"
with a bit of sweat on my brow,
I lift the brim of the straw hat
and reply, "lets eat light, I have
greens here from the garden,tomatoes,
turnips, no meat tonight,"
"Oh, this is intended to leave room
for fresh strawberry pie, I have a
fresh basket that I picked this
morning."
I remove the straw hat,
go to the pump for some water.
While pumping I see a horse
with a man, dark hair, long legs
with a smile approaching.
I push back my curls and shelter
my eyes from the sun with my hands.
"Hello," he yells out to me,
and with an instant I feel a smile
upon my face. My eyes seem
to twinkle at his presence,
my husband of course
Anthony.
We enjoy our light dinner
especially dessert,the strawberries
were immensely wonderful, with fresh
whipping cream upon the top.
In silver cups we shared a strong
tea. Lumps of sugar in a lovely
shaply silver container with a
crystal spoon.
The evening was grand.
The night was upon us, so one
by one, I helped Nora, our help
put out the oil burning lamps.
Shadows of many days to come
flashed before me, sending me to
strange times within my mind,
which I felt then, could not be.
But now I know it was real,
for here I am in those very days
that were within my mind in the
1900's.
Looking back , I still feel the
presence of my past...
Yet I welcome my now, and look
forward to the next new world
I will be a part of...
Dreams are real
Author notes
DeadUntilDark
P r u e d e n c e
My mind at times is somewhere else. This writing is one of those times...can't help but dream of a time when I might have lived...long ago..
A contest entry
- I want a lot of poems... by love my jose luis.
900 points, ended February 21, 2008, 125 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything goes by Angel Of Heaven99.
345 points, ended March 7, 2008, 45 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - #51 Turning green to gold by daviscth.
300 points, ended March 5, 2008, 52 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sapphire's Saga by Sensual Sapphire.
3530 points, ended April 3, 2008, 11 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Fairy-Tales, Spirit-Tales And Tales-Of-Wisdom ... In Verse - For Really Long Poems (100 lines +) by maa.
543 points, ended April 10, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Poems Please by Violet Moodswing.
875 points, ended June 29, 2008, 54 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - show me what you've got by raymondsgirl8708.
875 points, ended October 5, 2008, 28 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Secret Place by The Green Elf.
375 points, ended November 13, 2008, 22 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anyone Is Welcome, but I want your best. by borrowing.moonlight.
1600 points, ended May 30, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Stories in Verse by Samyuktha P.C..
1000 points, ended September 13, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your Best Prewrites! by Tqop.
700 points, ended September 25, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter.... by Aalta.
700 points, ends December 5, 68 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Very good job with this write. I really like the vivid imagery you've penned here, and the intriguing tale!
bravo and thank you for entering
♥ kate -
Things were nice long ago but only for certain people. Thanks for your entry. It was beautiful and well written.
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wow . this is excelllent. very interesting read... the imagery you've got in here is just lovely... thank you for entering :]
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interesting. this was well written and very thought out. thank you for entering and good luck in the contest hope to see you in round 2
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Interesting! It involves a lot of performance possibilities. Really well written.
Best of luck.
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Glad that you enjoyed it. I hope it will work for what you want to do. I thought this was a wonderful idea! Thanks again
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Lovely
Really does recreate a victorian poem which I guess is the point - a really good read and lets you drift off to that time - I liked it a lot
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Yess. good luck
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It's extremely lovely, I like the story especially. But it's not exactly a poem as much as a story, and it flows well for a story but not a poem. I love it though, thank you very much for entering ^_^
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very beautiful, and i believe it is true.dreams are real. because of my belief i believe in past lives. i think your experience could be entirely factual. anyway, thank you for entering your poem andthank you for following my rules. wishing you the best of luck
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This had no relevence to the contest at all.
Disqualified. -
I'm sorry, but I must disqualify you due to rule violations. Best of luck
-Darkscorpia -
great poem. good work. nice write.
Thank you for entering and good luck contest.
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this is very nostalgic it's cool very nice, and well written good luck,
Sam -
I like it, just not a winner.
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• if you would please space your name out in your AN like this : X x D r o w n . M e . D r y X x . Just out a space between each of your letters. Please. If you chose not to thats fine but i would like you you give me a reason. Thank you for putting your username in you’re an but I need it spaced as previously specified.
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done!
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I admit that it's good and you put in an exellent effort. Thank you for sharing! :-)
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I too will admit to it being interesting, more a story than a poem good job!
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this was an intersting poem to read
thanks for entering good luck -
you told a very engaging story here, it held my attention through out and was overall a solid piece, thank you for taking the time to enter
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Congratulations on winning many awards and this poem truly deserved to win the contests...I was fascinated by this and it left me thinking...Indeed a masterpiece,Regards,Hazel
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Congratulations
I see this peice has won many awards and rightfully so....I love peices that tell a story that engage the reader and this certainly did that. Full of wonderful images, very lovely images at that...BRAVO
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Option 5? A beautiful poem, fantastic imagery and a great ending.
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Excellent
Ah, 'tis a fine write, although the flow might be improved a wee bit. Since I believe in reincarnation and parallel realities (past, present, & future are one), I related rather well to this poem. Again, well done.
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Maam you have loaded your site nor just the poem
interesting and prosaic
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Hi - thanks for entering my contest - I enjoyed this. Best of luck!
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A well spun story that left me with a clear image after every word! I enjoyed reading that, thanks very much for entering! good luck in the contest!
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i love it. this kind of stuff is what i like!
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ty & gl
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Extremely Creative!! I think you could make an excellent prose out of this, with your very resilient voice and imagination. You create very knowable characters and a very interesting setting. Here and then, Here and then. I also like the theme that dreaming, though it may be all people have, is all anyone needs.
To the technical- I thought that this was kind of awkward in a poetic form. it didn't flow quite so smoothly as I first thought, as it reads more in a story from than as poem, but I got past it to see the real gem that you have presented here. Glad you chose this as your favorite.. I quite enjoyed the read. Cheers, Scion
Score:
Rules-9
Title-8.5
Theme-8.7
Structure-8.3
Uniqueness-8.8
Grammar-8.7
Total-52.0 -
hmmm... this piece makes me think... it's a great write. thank you for entering.
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Very vivid, wonderful and romantic imagery, that really transports one back in time. Thank you for entering my contest with such a lovely write.
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very nice
Good imagery. I like this poem. It's definitely different. -
very lovely imagery and a cute sweet story. Thanks for entering
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How beautifully you described the time. I love to have dreams that I remember the next morning. Maybe I will again soon. Your words flowed like honey from a bee. I loed the whole thing. Pen on...
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very impressive, and attractive writing stradegy really great !
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Thoughtful
You paint an idyllic picture of the Victorian past, remindng us of the elegance and sliding past the forms and formality that would have made this simple supper a true treat. But then, any meal that ends with strawberries is refreshing! Thanks for sharing your vision of the garden!
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'dreams are real'? then is the 'real'...dream?
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Very very good. My oh my thank you for etnering
this was something special
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hmmm. i liked this, its filled with rich imagery and tells a vivid story and paints a clear picture in my mind. the flow is a bit choppy in places, but because it reads like a story anyhow, i didnt really mind. this was lovely and unique, thank you.
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Hello.
This is a very graphic rich descriptive write. Not just graphic but it presents smells, ambience, taste, really does cater for the senses. The whole presentation is alive and brimming. To me it reads like the lady is commenting on her past life. I actually left a comment for this, but it was for the Storywrite entry so I am pasting it here as well. An expressive write.
My regards.
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I'm impressed
I like a dream state poem. I do a lot of role acting myself. Looks like it worked well for you! Keep that trophy winning pen penning!
Congratulations!
Jennifer
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I liked this very much. I love the pictures and stories of the olden times. I truly believe that i would have loved to live in those olden times.
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This really was a very fun read. Extremely enjoyable!
One thing that I will note was that I was a bit thrown off by your first stanza, "The year is 1900's/ Victorian Era"...... With beginning with "the year is..." it leads one to expect a single year like "1910" or something like that, not a whole era. Does that make any sense? I know, it's a really nitpicky thing but it threw me off and I began to read the poem like you didn't really know what you were doing, and then it was later that I saw you really did know what you were doing and I had to go back and read the beginning again. All because of silly assumptions. So ya, the only thing I would reword would be the very first stanza
Seriously, the rest was amazing. Thanks for allowng me to read it by entering it in the contest! -
Very interesting
I have not seen a piece like this and it is still a lot for me to take in...very nice. I can close my eyes and feel like I'm back in time. Sometimes I feel myself that dreams are real. Structure is great and you can tell this peace was very well thought out:
"Looking back , I still feel the
presence of my past..."
I feel the same at times, although the past of something much more recent. Very intriguing piece, I'm going to have to give it another read; always a good thing. Preliminarily I will say...8/10! Great work, back to re-reading!
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I think this is superb. I write some like this myself. You might like some of the short pieces I put in Storywrite. This captures some exceptionally beautiful images and has a surrealistic quality.
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Great story
great story here filled with lots of love and precious memories. Thanks for entering! One applaud per entry to be fair!
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LUSH POEM!!!!! I loved the victorian era. i'm writing a book about the Victorian era but a servants life. If you add a couple more lines it would be better and explain how you feel a bit more. This really helps me to know what Victorian rich life (I assume you are rich in this)is like. This is the first Victorian poem i've read so thanks. If you could give me some tell me a bit more about Victorian rich life it would help me with my story. If your lucky I'd even dedicate the book to you which I don't usually do. Please keep in contact because i'd like to chat about victorian era. Thanks for entering and good luck.
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Thank you for your comment on my poem, "Way Back Then," I am glad that you enjoyed it. I am also glad that you have interest in the Victorian Era! It was a great time for women. I would be glad to help you in anyway possible with your book. I don't know all there is to know about this era but I do know somethings. So feel free to contact me at anytime. Thanks again
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This is lovely, a fuckload of imagery and I loved the last line
Thanks for entering.
Stay sick.
xx sin -
lots of imagery! it really painted a picture in my mind!! thanks for the entry
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such a unique poem i loved the stor
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I thought it seemed like a very lovely place.And I beat it wasn't 4 dollars a gallon for gas?Now was it?That is most likely the PERfect place around...or was since this took place in the 1900's!Anyway nice writ good luck!~
Signed confused -
This tells a very amazing story and is very interesting.It is for sure not a poem I read every day. But I like it
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OMG I dont think I've ever seen a poem with this many comments on it. Thas incredible. Howe many awards has it won lol?? Mind you upon reading its easy to see how it has had such a great response here on AP. Congrats on all of your awards.
My favourite part is:
"Shadows of many days to come
flashed before me, sending me to
strange times within my mind,
which I felt then, could not be." -
sorry, I already commented on this a while back, didn't realise when I clicked.
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this reads a lot like prose, and not prosaic poetry, but straight prose. it reads like normal vernacular, and while it well written enough, it isn't what i'm looking for.
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Great job!
And good luck in my contest!
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Very nice write here
Indeed we can make our dreams those of love and excitment and the ways of the young and relive them forever more -
Wasn't that just lovely to enjoy!
I basked in this poem, I love the gardens...and wouldn't
it be nice to have our very own Norah!
So smartly written and flow perfection!
lovely essences of textures and layers through out!
ears/Seattle BRAVO! BRAVO! -
Interesting perspective and an unusual take on the chosen image, perhaps just a little more verbose than I would have liked. thanks for entering, best wishes to you.
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a very pleasurable read very descriptive of an age long gone but still remembered fondly by many
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I have read and commented on this piece before...but the fact that I remembered it is a good thing.
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Oh... Very nice story... I really love how descriptive it was.
Wonderful job
Best of luck
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i really liked the story in this and think that it is very interesting, with some nice details. one little syntactical issue is that the victorian era for the most part preceded 1900 but i still think it is a very lovely poem.
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pretty good
dreams aren't always (they usually aren't) real but this poems really good
i like the looking back, i still feel the presence of my past... part the most
overall, pretty good -
For everyone who entered my contest so far you may want to read the rules this is the only and final warning I am giving out because this contest is so simple and i ask for anything and there were very few rules..if you did not follow ALL the rules you have no chance of winning..i Probably have viewed it but walked right past it cause you didnt follow the rules..if you choose to follow the rules and change what you did wrong..bring it to my attention and let me know that you changed it or else i will NOT view it again! If I delete it before you get a chance to make a change you may change it and then add it to the contest again if you choose to..thank you..
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I must say that by 1900 the Victorian era was almost over. Queen Victoria died in 1901, but I thought you caught the spirit of the history.
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this has wonderful imagery! which option did u choose?
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I like this one. I'm not really old enough to dream about my past, but you dragged me into your dreams with this piece.
Thankyou for entering and good luck
Katie -
Strange..
but enchanting account of a life once
lived in the past of the future. A most
intriguing reflection of dreams and fantasies
experienced in the cathedral of the mind.
Where there are so many unknowns and endless
posibilites. A very cozy and affectionate write
that draws the reader in. Nice work
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L10 I'd personally use another word other than "hills" in that line as the preceding line already places emphasis where it's needed.
L16 "And upon my return" I feel would fit better there.
I would also left align this piece.
Just a couple of minor suggestions.
Thanks for entering and congrats on the amount of applause this piece has received.
La x
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this puts me in mind of Jane Austen and her novels of social graces and the right ambience for the romantic relationship, different days to now.
'Lumps of sugar in a lovely
shapely silver container with a
crystal spoon'
how little time mattered then -
this is a very nice poem, and the imagery is tremendous...it flows like a story, not like a poem, and i like that. thank you for entering!
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This a truly beautiful poem. The imagery is magnificent and the story it tells... just simply amazing. I loved everything about it, down to the curls and present times.
Keep up the good work, and congrats on your trophies! -
Oh how wonderful! not a deep poem, or profound, or complex, but emminently charming just as it is! A beautiful dream, a well-painted scene and a most enjoyable read!
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if i take you back to the 19th century will you comment on my poem?....lol
Good work Lassie.
BLESSINGS ALWAYS,
LOWELL POE
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pretty
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Quite Interesting Love the imagery. Like you are writing about a past life you had. I believe sometimes people are re-incarnated lol. Well Done thank you for sharing.
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This is a lovely piece of imagery. It has a sad sort of tone but at the same time very hopeful of the future. well done
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Beautifully penned poem. The imagery was outstanding, and the idea of a 1900s poem was great, since I have not read one like this on AP yet. Thanks for sharing this lovely piece & best of lucl
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the imagery in this poem is amazing, you did a really awesome job describing the 1900's thanks for entering and good luck
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So descriptive and so cool!!! From reading I've interpretted this as a dream, but reincarnation entered my mind at first. I love this poem.
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Enjoy contest where one can use prewrites and give others a chance to read something we wrote a while ago. This poem has won its far share of trophies - congratulations on all this hardware. Liked the flow and the educational information in these lines as well.
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As a history lover I commend you for portraying the Victorian era so well. Have you considered doing historical fiction? It has a huge market right now - very popular. Regardless, you do outstanding work. Bravo poet. Give us more.
-Niur Tarow -
how amazing … this dream looks more like a past-life-experience to me … I also have this sort of dreams … sometimes as delightful as yours, sometimes times of pain remembered … I feel that this dream was a great blessing for you, offered by you to you
it inspires me deep peace and good karma, so to say …
I wonder if today, in your current incarnation, your home somehow reflects that ancient time through certain objects that date back or remind of the Victorian era … how about your clothes, and the films you enjoy ? anything in common ?
thank you so much for sharing this precious verse with us on the occasion of this contest,
maa
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What a wonderful journey you have taken me on. I love this era too! I sometimes wonder of past lives myself and who I might have been. Amazing imagery I so enjoyed reading. Thanks for sharing. love and hugs Theresa
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A superbly penned poem, the depth of detail leads to stunning imagery. Awesome write
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I like this piece.
I really like this piece, it has a lot of character to it. The deep thoughts and the trip back in time is enchanting. I think that you wrote a splendid piece here dear.
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How lovely. I was certainly taken back in time through your poem. It was a nice journey. I also feel a connection with the Victorian Era, and many other "eras". I believe that it is quite possible that we visit there in our dreams through the collective, or possibly some kind of astral time travel, or, that we were there in past lives. Thought provoking and thank you for sharing with us. My favorite part was the fresh strawberries with whipping cream. That made my mouth water for that! What a simple, proper time that was, yet they had their share of problems too. Every era does! lol's
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You have painted such a beautiful and elegant image in this poem. The imagery is vivid. Simple yet alluring in a special way like a rose.
I love the story of the poem but not the way i was given to us. This poem doesn't sound like a poem. It's like a short story placed in lines so that it looks like a poem and i didn't like that,it put me off in a way.
So apart from the above, i liked your poem.It was pleasing for me to read because i am attracted to the pasts and to the days you describe. My favourite image was the one of the husband arriving on his horse and the woman sheltering her eyes from the sun to look at him and smiling. Quite a fantasy! -
This paints such a beaufiul picture in the mind of the reader. thanks for sharing and good luck
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this didnt strike me as amazing. i like the story that is told, but i wish you would have shown me the story instead of just 'telling' me. good writ
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Close...
This is a wonderful write, I love the vivid descriptions, lends a very real feel to the piece. Well done. However, contest is for HM exclusively, got to let it go. -
Great piece but unfortunately you are the 34th person to enter a prewrite so I have to remove you because I am only allowing 25 prewrites on a first come first serve basis.
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I like the open ended ending. It kinda lets one wonder things like where will they be next, what will happen, things like that.
Good luck.
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Quite the trip back in time you take us on in this poem - a few nice trophies for this write as well. Dreams are certainly very realistic at times; we wish we could live through them sometimes.
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Oh I read this one already and it was lovely
I will leave acomment so you wont lose points and it is a very good write
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