There was a young lassie from Footdee
Who had Gaelic tatooed on each titty
In a really good light
Reading from left to right
They made up a real witty ditty
A tourist from South of the border
Read the words in the total wrong order
He thought that they said:
"Prithee, jump into bed
With this lassie, and then try to board her."
So he acted on this invitation
(He had thought that the words were Croatian)
He was thoroughly pissed
When she shouted, "Desist!"
He thought she'd said "C'moan!" in Haitian
Then, when he removed all his clothes
She gave him a punch on the nose
And with a strong jostle
She scalded his tossel
Wi' a bowie o' bubbling brose
With a deafening yammer of pain
He disappeared into the rain
To return to his city
And as for wee Footdee
Well, he never went back there again
Author notes
Footdee is a real place.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Footdee
A contest entry
- TEN THOUSAND POINTS OF RHYME (Now 20,000+) Part 7 Humour by cricketjeff.
1250 points, ended January 15, 2008, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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A very amusing string of limericks, but as I don't speak Gaelic I'll give it a miss. Thanks for your entry in our contest.
Please join us in future contests
Sue and Jeff -
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Well, as a matter of fact, I don't speak Gaelic either. And I dinnae see any here. Never mind.
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Hilarious bunch of limericks. Footdee sounds an interesting place! Good luck in the contest.
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Great!
that was so hullarious i absolutely loved it. It kept me reading and flowed so perfectly! great job! -
This has to be my smile for the day,Stanza three being my favoutite.
Good flow and rhythm,
More than can be said for that villian
jumpin on the lady un-willin
and scaldin'his tossle
in the horendous jostle
She felt obliged
to pay compensation.
and gave him a lift to the station
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