Deep slumber fills the brain
Eradicating pain
Almost gone we sigh
Tears fall
Here my cry.
Author notes
“I accept that DP Robertson can be a complete prick when it comes to commenting on something he obviously doesn’t like – I have waived my right to complain to moderators and owner of this site about his help wrapped in thistles type comments on my beloved poetry. Although I believe DP Robertson may have a bitter and twisted side to his nature, he has the right to criticise my doggerel anyway he sees fit with whatever words he chooses.”
A contest entry
- ANYTHING YOUR LITTLE HEART WISHES TO FOB OFF AS POETRY. by dp robertson.
700 points, ended February 11, 2008, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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“I accept that DP Robertson can be a complete prick when it comes to commenting on something he obviously doesn’t like – I have waived my right to complain to moderators and owner of this site about his help wrapped in thistles type comments on my beloved poetry. Although I believe DP Robertson may have a bitter and twisted side to his nature, he has the right to criticise my doggerel anyway he sees fit with whatever words he chooses.”
Should I say that this just stinks?
How will it make you think…of me
I on the other hand don’t really care
Tis unbelievably ordinary what you have there.
David
PS just to top this cracker off, “Here my cry” should be“Hear my cry” – and when I read this, how true, I think the neighbours could have heard my cry.
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This is a short and lovely little acrostic poem, the imagery and diction is fairly used well thanks for entering
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