You hold my heart
In your hand,
But you just don't
Understand.
For your love I'd
Live or die,
And you don't seem
To care why!
You're love's like
Open heart surgery.
It just cuts me like a knife.
You're love's like
Open heart surgery
And I just might lose my life.
You fill my heart
With so much pain.
Your cutting words
Drive me insane.
You reach inside
With icy hands.
Such deadly love
None understands!
You're love's like
Open heart surgery.
And I've no more left to give.
You're love's like
Open heart surgery
Release my heart; let me live!
Author notes
The album cover art for this song can be found at:
http://fc03.deviantart.com/fs18/f/2007/182/2/d/Raw_Onion_album_cover_by_HeatherRoseBrown.jpg
A contest entry
- Give me some dark, cryptic lyrics.. Or make me wonder what the hell you are talking about! by Silversunshine.
600 points, ended January 12, 2008, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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PS.. Awesome album cover art!!! That's way creative!
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This sounds like it's a very cool song! I like the lyrics! Very poppy.. I hear it being kind of mid tempo or upbeat.. Though it's a good song, it is not the cryptic, dark song I am looking for! I enjoyed reading this! Thanks for entering my contest!
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Great poem. I really enjoyed reading it. Couple of things I wanna say about it; Number one stanza one thrid line doesnt make sense to me. Is it suppose to be but you just dont understand? Also at the end of that stanza I think a little punctuation would be great like a comma after after the care and a question mark instead of a exclamation point because I just feel like it'd be more dramatic and that's the kind of feeling you're going for in this one right?Dark and dramatic...if I'm not mistaken lol. In fact I think you should get rid of all the exclamation points. I love the use of repetition in this poem really drill the feeling into me. I also love some of the phrases you have in there like "Reach inside with icy hands" and "you're love's like open heart surgery. And i've no more left to give." My favorite part?
"You're love's like
Open heart surgery.
It just cuts me like a knife.
You're love's like
Open heart surgery.
And I've no more left to give."
Those two without a doubt. Very insperational to me actually. Well done. I enjoyed it.
-King
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