Pretend
For a moment
What
Could be
Imagine
What -we-
Could kill
Petty hearts
Strewn all over
Marble glass floors
The blood
Caressing your face
Lovingly,
Devoutly.
Glazed eyes
Starring up at -me-
Pleading,
To be let out of hell.
Calloused fingertips
Grasping edges of wounds
Of silver
Invaders.
Cut up lips
Sewn together
Silencing them from
Screaming.
Crystal laughs
Emit as we recreate
Our purgatory
As goddesses.
Bodies scattered
Across our eyes
And into our minds
.this.is.you.and.me.
Author notes
K. this was written in complete boredom. basically it's my best friend Indigo and I going on a massive murder spree... imagination.. it helps.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Well, sweetie... This is okay because it's not the overly-punctuated cliched crap that most people write about when they do DP. This was actually pretty good... Mummy loves you darlin' ♥
Love Mummy xoxox -
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Thank you, Mummy. It was just fun writing it. Muahs. Hmm.. I like butterflies. I wonder why people try and kill them and press them into big books for a rich persons collection. silly people.
(yes, i feel like I'm a 5YO again. Talking and typing like it too. O.O)
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My initial response no joke was "oooooo, I like it" I geuss that makes me twisted... anyways this form is a hard on to write in but I really enjoyed your poem it made me genuinly smile.
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lol. If you're twisted just for liking it, then I think I must be super twisted for actually writing it... Thanks for the yellow clappy dude and comment.
Claire-Anne
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WHOA!!!!!!!!!!! freakish
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Very Nice
How am I not suprised that my sweet Aussie of a sis is on a murdering rampage LOL! I love it when a poet goes wild and uses their imagination to this extent and I have to admit if there was ever a dark contest that would fit this poem into I believe you would win hands down unchallenged because its just that good of a write. I really love it with your words how you incorporate them into a story like flow and yet its just shortened to make it look nicer. any ways nice work sis all round and keep penning away.
Sincerely, Bro
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I wouldn't exactly call this dirty pretty, but it is nevertheless an excellent piece of writing.
Petty hearts
Strewn all over
Marble glass floors
The blood
Caressing your face
Lovingly,
Devoutly.
Calloused fingertips
Grasping edges of wounds
Of silver
Invaders.
Those verses really stood out to me, the language used throughout all of this is fantastic.
Keira
MidnightRain -
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Yeah. Like i said before. I had to go otherwise i wouldve missed my train.. and i'll be making it a bit more dirty pretty... although i'm aware that one style of DP is not in the grammar but the words..
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It's so good to see you post something again! It has been too long little girl! You need to get on more often. This was... ... hmm... pretty.
I can't say I haven't had this same fantasy with friends of mine. Nice job. You creative freak you!
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*giggles innocently* yeah i cant write all the time.. would rather write one good poem than a million crappy ones. lol.
and yeah yeah yeah im a freak. who isnt??
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Lol, this is a wonderful poem Raven.blood, was just laughing at your AN It's very powerful
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Hah. Why doesn't this surprise me. This is actually not half bad kiddo. Excellent vocabulary!
♥Dandy-Bandy
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lol. yeah.i was rushed posting it coz i hadda catch a train. really puts a stop on things but thanks for the comment. it was just a hell random poem. that my friend absolutly loved. lol. muahs..
love ya randy-bandy..
Claire the friendly care bear.
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this is cool
i miss you
love you sweetheart
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