What makes a man put a bullet in his head?
To concede life and wish he were dead?
To leave his family and his home?
Leave them desperate and all alone?
He's been struggling to survive since the day he was born.
Scratching and clawing til his heart and his mind and his souls been torn.
What is a man supposed to do?
Dust himself off and start anew?
How can a man revisit his past?
Fix whats broken and make it last?
Feeling fear of the future unknown.
Feeling scared and believing he's alone.
His only choice is to end it all.
To forget about life and place his final call.
In a list
A contest entry
- I Should Have Won PW Bests by InMyFlames.
430 points, ended January 23, 2008, 24 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - all HM winners! by Cat10.
850 points, ended May 19, 2008, 39 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Suicide Solution by Blood Magick.
540 points, ended July 26, 2008, 79 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I don't usally write dark poetry but thought i'd give it a try......let me know what ya think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Nice poem, thanks for entering =]
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thanks for entering! I really, really like this piece because I can relate..I had a friend shoot himself a few years ago..and I'm pretty sure this is how he felt...and I've felt this way before.. you did a fantastic job! good luck!
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Good job. Very emotional, and ver powerful.
Excellent write, and the best of luck
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wow i love this. when someone kills themself everyone sits there and thinks how could they? but i love how you showed the how a person could. plus i loved the rhyme. thankyou so much for entering my contest and best of luck!
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Hmmm, I've heard of many who think of killing themselves and some I know have had family members who have. It's a scary reality isn't it. It's nicely written though and yeah sometimes you can understand why they would consider doing such a thing.
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Phew, now that's dark.
Got some brutal imagery in this write, with some powerful emotions. Well done, thanks for entering. -
Wow... Ur great.... Best of Luck...
~Nat &hearts -
I don;t think I have an answer to the questions you ask, actually I don't think anyone really knows why. Its a good poem. Thoughts of thought in it.
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good questions to ask...Ive done so many times.
good rhyme and flow, I liked it a lot!
Thanks for entering.
Cheers,
S -
that's interesting and a great poem good luck in my contest
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Dark? Ummm.. its very questionable. A poetic dwell into the picture. Very intriguing and nicely prompted.
Thanks for entering,
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very nice " Feeling scared and believing he's alone.
His only choice is to end it all.
To forget about life and place his final call." are my favourite lines, great work -
Outstanding
I thought there was a lot of soul searching in this poem as you tried to empathise with the character in the poem. It is a dark and difficult subject to write about and I thought you brought this out in your poetry. Best of luck in the contest.
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i think its great
good job and good luck
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i think you did a good job and this is dark
and very true to life and realy sad
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