It hurts [inside]
to see
I'm trying to help
And all I get
is --> nothing <--
from you
or anyone
It hurts [inside]
to think I'm getting s h o v e d
in a corner
like dirty laundry
It hurts [inside]
to KNOW
that I'm trying to help
and you don't even
.care.
Author notes
My first attempt at a Dirty Pretty poem, and I'm sorry if it truned out awful.
A contest entry
- Beautiful Dirty Pretty Poetry by Carpe Noctem.
525 points, ended January 3, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Hi
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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It Hurts.....yes I hear what you are saying....Star this is a very very well written poem, and filled with the emotions that I knew all too well at your age and still tend to know....I loved this...
Wiz
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:) I can't write DP
There for I can not give you an honest OP if it is good or bad, I do like the style of the poem and the way you used the punct. Marks
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haha thank you for the comment!
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Well, it's far from awful, a very god attempt at dirty pretty. Thanks for entering, and best of luck!
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You...
(jk)
Nice poem, although dirty pretty was something I didn't expect from you, lol.
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it's okay, we all have to try things out and learn from them, that's what we all do... my first dp was awful, really bad!
anyways... I liked this, it was simple and I can relate to it because it seems the story of my life... people just push me away when I try and help, for their own good.
Shame that.
Great write anyways. -
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thanks for your comment!
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