Quizzical,
Hemlocks bow
Beneath snow
And ice, form
Natural
Question marks,
Arabesques
Cold-carved in
Frozen night--
Black-on-white--
Then gravely
Greenly hued,
With white-dawn’s
Rigid chill--
Sentinels,
Sheer blue-iced
Fountains caught
Between heart-
Beat, twinkling
Breath--hemlocks
Guard and greet,
And whisper,
And agree
To wait
http://allpoetry.com/poem/3247304
Posted 29 July 2007
Restoration
November wind breath ice behind stark promises;
ragged clouds pulled thin, Asian pear dipped
leaf-first in mustard, dried soot-black bark;
roses curled fœtally furl in furls, red-stained
dark—iris crisped, melting bonelessly...and
sharpened pencils nudge swollen bases,
emerge point-most over blood-brown
bark, sheath-wrapped veins urge up and
out and November winds swirl promises—
Cymbidium budstalks break winter silence
http://allpoetry.com/poem/3756450
Posted Dec 31, 2007
A contest entry
- First and Last by CarolDesjarlais.
525 points, ended January 4, 2008, 27 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Oh my goodness. The first poem is concise and I felt, as a reader, forced to your exact descriptions, but the second poem whoo hoo!
the metaphors in it were stupendous, I was enthralled and pulled in
This very well puts you in the In-The Running List. -
-
Thank you for the enthusiasm and most gracious comments. "Quizzical" was the first piece I wrote after moving to Idaho in mid-February, just after a heavy snow. The hemlocks seemed to bend under its weight, into question marks. The poem also broke a long dry spell, so it was the first thing I though of for an AP contest.
And the second...it has always stunned me that orchids send out their bloom stalks in mid-winter. Somehow the two sets of image-complexes seem mutually exclusive, so to have them juxtaposed makes poetry inevitable.
Again, thank you. Much appreciated.
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