You know,
I was trying to figure out something to write
To show you
What I can do
But every time I tried
To write something down
This little voice came into my head
I hear it now
It says "You know they're so much better."
And I know they are
They always are
But please,
I don't want to sound like one of those people
Who complains about being inferior
And does nothing but that.
So i'm going to do my best
To describe why
When it is sunny outside
Or when it is late at night
I feel this way...
Sometimes,
A song can bring it out in me
Other times,
It's just the feeling
That no one understands
And that the only way to end it
Is to die alone
I'd die for her
But mostly because
I'm guilty that sometimes I get angry
And want to hurt myself
I know it scares her
But will it ever go away?
When people are around
I can suppress it
Because they make me laugh
And they make me forget
That I look stupid
When I do that
Sometimes I get angry
Because I want to hurt myself
But I'm still afraid of the pain
So I don't
And I still eat too much
And they laugh and joke
And say I'm fat
Or stupid
He even said he thought I was a boy
And I laughed
And pretended not to care
While she says how I don't get upset easily
But I know better
And yet
Sometimes when they're around,
I laugh and joke like they do
And I mean it
So I'm not messed-up or anything
Not really
So I hope this is okay,
I know it won't win or anything
I'm not asking for that,
Believe me
But at least you know a bit more about me now
And please, don't worry about me
There are other people
Who have it a lot worse
This is not supposed to sound pitiful
It's just the truth
That's all.
Author notes
http://allpoetry.com/poem/3704220
For my sister,
please don't see this as a plea for attention, or anything like that. I'm not depressed, or angry or mad at you. I'm just saying the things I feel, and I'm not asking you or anyone else to do anything for me regarding this. I may not always be happy, but life isn't that simple sometimes. Forgive me if I have ever scared you with the things I say or write or think, I wouldn't hurt myself because I know it would hurt you. Love,
Cadence
A contest entry
- Write Me Your Best--- INVITE ONLY by daviscth.
6000 points, ended January 11, 2008, 33 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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really good, i like
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Very good write
From the heart and yes we do all get such feelings at times and we get beyond it for when we do get together with friends and family we cant hear those voices within . And whisper thankyou for the laughter once again
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very good
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i like it. it shows me exactly how you feel, and it's cool to know how you think. C: i know how you feel sometimes.....[regarding the first and second stanzas]. nice job
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Hold on a second while I stop crying
Thanks.
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Thank you so much for posting in my contest. I enjoyed reading this and I wish you the best of luck at judging, Cathy
I'm glad to know that you'd never hurt yourself sweetie.
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