Quietly and patiently
you wait against that tree
While nearby my life
is in catastrophe.
I bleed and I cry,
my calls find deaf ears
I try to catch you
when a Wall of Word appears
Every tale, every lie
now separates me from you.
Thin but so solid,
There seems nothing I can do.
Beating my fists and
kicking my feet
but for all my progress,
it might as well be concrete.
I slide to the floor
seeping with sorrow,
nonetheless I get up and
pound some more tomorrow.
For days, for weeks,
I tear at the lies.
Confessing each one,
screaming to the skies.
I must break through,
just one touch of your face!
Then I see light shining
through a small square space.
I stumble to reach
that Window of Hope,
my weary legs, though,
are unable to cope.
I look up to see
you fading away
trapping me in a House of Lies
forever to stay.
A contest entry
- The Inner Circle - Bronze by Never Fall in Love.
900 points, ended January 11, 2008, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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you can really tell that you were going through something with this. i hope you are okay now though. this is really emotional and just great.
good job
-fearlesslybroken
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Intense!
This poem is so intense but so for real. I can feel the pain tearing at me when I read this poem. You have some crazy talent!
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This is a very interesting poem but it seems as though you have a bleak outlook on life.
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I am amazed. I feel like you reached into mind and pulled everything im thinking of out.
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Such a vivid description of emotion. Nice flow. Lies all seem to have a fly paper consistency, holding us hostage on the brink. Great write!
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ROMANTICSM
love the way you peice each line together to create a beautiful drama scene...<3 mariah
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Nice imagery. Beautifully laid out. I can see why this grabbed the gold.
Congrats!
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Imagery is very well done. It does indeed read kind of like a movie. As for the story line, I think kind of cliche. Though you introduced it in a different way we all know how that story goes. Love the back ground.
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This sounds better in your voice than in mines. I've adopted a certain passion to actually hearing the author read it. As I caught you the other day reading, I know the tone of this- and makes it all the more interesting to read.
I have to say that I love the direction in which you took this. A brillian view and certainly fits your theme. A wall of lies ... total brilliance!
Never ♥
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hey, I havent been on in forever, and wow how I missed your poetry.
This seriously gave me so many chills reading all the way through. You've always written so magnificently and this just is, amazing I felt so much emotion through your words, and your rhyming flowed so nicely! It was a beautiful write, and I can't wait to see your poetry that I've missed while I was away.
Great write! <3 Sam.
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WoW this reads like a movie.
You done really well with this piece,
your words match the picture, just right.
Very emotional and sad, still there is a drop
of hope in parts of your write.
I enjoyed reading this.
loveandblessings2u & yours always
Joyce
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wonderful
i could see the picture so clear through the whole poem great job like always.
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wow
another intensly emotional write, you describe feeling in this with greatness, a wonderful write!!!
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