Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Seasons Change

Missing image




 

Father time stood in awe
amidst July's fireworks
in January
as May melted
December's blanket

of snow.


Hope was harvested
in moon's birth,
fear was washed away
with April showers induced

by irish charm,

but leap of faith,
failed
in Yuletime dance,
killing softly,
three words whispered
through champagne kisses.





In a list

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 21 of 21

  • leander Moderators member
    February 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ooh, great how you used months to paint images - and create wonderful metaphors with them This has a rather sad edge to it, or did I catch that wrongly?

  • Have left the site
    January 31, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You have moved through the seasons with such sadness.

    This is a very good poem but leaves me very blue. Heartache will do that and sometimes tomorrows seem so far away.

    I can see why this is in the spotlight. A very beautiful poem. -Wil


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love the wheel of the year flowing in this one. In few words you've summed up a relataionship, not only of the heart, but almost of humanity itself at times. This one will cling for awhile, just toying with you. Superb job Bel!


  • Nicolette gold member
    January 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A bittersweet year you've penned here... reminds me very much of a poem I've posted earlier this week too. This one moves from the fireworks to loss...A sad one this is.. it falls as gently on the senses as snowflakes... yes, seasons change and people too - and so very often they forget to tell each other...

    ~ Nicolette


  • CaliOkie silver member
    January 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Well crafted

    You resist the temptation to list the three words whispered. These images and ideas are beautifully reduced to their basic essence and your gift for understatement has left this poem fresh and clean. Nothing is overworked or cliche. Unique. Your words are not part of a formula and they cut to the quick like a sharp knife.

    I could stand to learn a thing or two from your writing. Elegant.

    Thank you for refreshing me.

    CaliOkie


  • Idle Mind Wondering silver member
    January 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    'tis bitter sweet, strong in sorrow's acceptance. I am left sad.

    such is poetry of the heart


  • Animarising
    January 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I like this. Very interesting structure and not overplayed. Excellent!

  • elmosworld16
    January 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    pretty good

    actually thought this was good

    usually dont like the stuff on here

    <3

  • mwilson50
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Intriguing

    Starts out hopeful, and then the last stanza - wham!whatever the three words were, they had to be pretty bad. Interesting and well-done.


  • Phineas Red
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I feel like this is something we'd read in English class. I can see it in a book, with like, little footnotes trying to dissect it. I like the monthly imagery at the beginning and the sadder tone towards the end. great job.


  • Fedrizzi
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    o,o

    I am completely flabbergasted by the shear ... well... amazingness of this poem! (Yes i do realize i just basically made up a word) but yes. This is marvelous, beautiful, andl..wow. Congratulations on this stunningly wondrous write!!!


  • mborda
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!

    Man, this is some serious poetry here! Fantastic imagery!! Short and to the point, just like I like 'em! Great job!

    Monique

  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent write this is awesome, it has wonderful imagery and flow as well there's almost a lyrical sense about it.


  • Bedroom Eyes
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Simply marvelous Bel!

    A wonderful display of imagery that flows refreshing...like a mountain stream

    Well done Sweets!!!

    Happy New Year to you!!!!!



    (3 hugs to go with 3 bunnies )


  • incondite
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Amazing

    Wow this is just amazing. You have a real talent. Keep penning
    -Alone


  • Kari gold member
    January 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh wow , this was totally beautiful! I loved it from the start to the finish. Awesome job bel!! This was very heartfelt indeed.


  • Laura
    December 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow this is abs beautiful... the words just seemed to flow so elegantly and with such strength well done love this really is an amazing poem xxx


  • Ahti
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written, Bel.
    I know, at least somewhat, as do you,
    Of the Irish charm, aye?


    Time moves by so quickly anymore,
    The more I age.
    You show this well.
    Keep writing.


    -Saint


  • Mad Moon silver member
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Bel...This is simply amazing!! The entire first stanza is a kind of oxymoron in itself. "Father time stood in awe" gives the feeling of standing still, yet the pace of these first few lines say quite the opposite as it takes you rapidly through the seasons. It's like a whole year just wipes across the page while Father time stands with his mouth agape! Brilliantly executed!! Love this whole poem, Girl! But, I have to admit, that last stanza really got me. "...killing softly, three words whispered through champagne kisses...." Just WOW!! Beautifully done, dear one! Poetic devices were expertly used, as well as stellar verbiage. BRAVA!! Love it!!


  • poetryality silver member
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Love the seasons changing in the first stanza! Brilliant damn it! Loved this! Absolutely!


    Always ♥

    Mom


  • Heavenly Angel
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    A beautifully poignant piece this is, Bel
    Your wording and the emotions that come across....beyond compare
    A fine sharing from that very talented pen of yours
    Excellent!
    All the best to you!
    Hugs,
    Sandy

1 - 21 of 21