I stand at the bottom of a mountain.
It seems a million miles tall.
As soon as I see the top,
Your face appears in my mind.
I begin to climb,
With determination.
But only two feet up
The steepness is too much.
I sit down to think.
"Why is this so hard?"
I ask myself.
"Why do I have to work for love?"
I look up to see you at the top...
Only 900 miles away it seems.
Then you smile,
And suddenly you are right next to me.
How is it
That you smile and you're here,
But I have to work so hard
Just to feel your touch?
You take my breath away,
And I love you so much.
I could never not love you,
And I know that you love me, too.
But I guess it seems
the opposite for you.
You feel like you have to work,
While all I do is smile.
It feels the same for both of us.
But maybe it is the same.
Maybe we have to work hard to keep love,
But the smile each of us has
Is all it takes for us to love at that moment.
Author notes
i loved this picture. i'm going to add it into this so you all can see where i got the inspiration...
http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b185/specialStar/blue_rosea1.jpg
i hope i got it right!
A contest entry
- Speaking from your heart - Image prompt by m2lost24get.
800 points, ended January 12, 2008, 16 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pimp up my picture inspired poetry by leander.
400 points, ended January 31, 2008, 46 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How did you like it? Anything to fix?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
This is a very sweet and tender poem you have written here, that totally fits the picture you used
One always needs to work for love, if you take it for granted, then that is the moment when things go 'wrong'.
Thank you for entering the contest, I wish you the best of luck!
Leander -
Bravo!!! Bravo!!! Bravo!!!
koko, Congratulations on the Honorable Mention and your words of love were fantastic. When two people love each other very much they have to share what is inside to keep that spark alive. When it is your soul mate that is easy to do. That smile shared can be all it takes to light up the world for each other. Thank you for sharing this with all of us. It is beautiful. Love and God bless, Joyce
-
Beautifully written and so true.
On line 6: It sounds a bit awkward to me... I begin to climb,
With determination in my mind.
Above in line 4 you say... Your face appears in my mind. So you have already used the 'in my mind' part there and it sound swkward to repeat the phrase 2 lines later. I would just say... I begin to climb,
With determination. That make a powerful statement.
Anywa, it is a beautiful written poem. Take care and good luck!
~Donna~
-
-
There.
thanks it sounded awkward to me too, after you mentioned it. Thank you!
Koko
-
-
so very true and the harder we try the farther apart we seem to feel we are. our hopes are usually entwined by the distances of our hearts yet enveloped close within the wings of our souls. Often the distance sheds tears upon our beings yet it feels as though their love and strength stands side by side, and often even for them ours or their smile brightens their words in unrealized wonder. thank you for entering and many blessings always xx
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
