When your voice shuts down and can’t break free,
coursing that road to self-discovery,
you see the chains that you alone must shake:
habits, ideas and that heart-felt break
with hidden aspects you now need to shed.
Whispers of truth gently prod you ahead.
Those icy fruits of unrequited love,
falling from wormy-boughs that hang above
arriving paralyzed in rigid form
melt in the might of one delightful storm.
In disappointment, innocence is lost;
truth and abundance are won at its cost.
Author notes
Jim, this is my take on your dream ...
A pen chained to a desk with a real chain: I think the pen is your self-expression being forcefully held in check by routines, old ideas and relationships that you are continually analyzing.
The elderly folks are the tired-out aspects of your 'self' that you want to shed.
The popsicles are the pleasures and satisfaction of life that await you, once you accept the transformation.
A contest entry
- Interpret my dreams please... by Jimfre Talbent.
450 points, ended January 3, 2008, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Have you ever had Jim's dream? Or, a similar one?
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Beautiful flow and impeccable rhyme, the images are potent and dealt with masterfully. Congratulations on the gold trophy.
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a good piece of poetry which flows smoothly along, aye, we all have chains that must be broken if we are to move along the road of self-discovery, i like the ending here, their is a price for everything in life, it has to be paid.
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Your command on the language is so apparant-you write extremely well-your thoughts have a clarity weighed with wisdom-loved every line of thie piece-'that you alone must shake:'-'Whispers of truth gently prod you ahead.'gentle and soft-'melt in the might of one delightful storm.'-'truth and abundance are won at its cost.'-I salute your mastery over words-Bravo!
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I took this to heart. I connected it to what I am going through in life, even though that's more than likely not what it is written for it touched me. Thanks for sharing. Great job and keep up the good writing.
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Hmmm
I liked the poem for it's general aptness to everyday life without even knowing it was a contest entry. Well crafted and major kudos for hauling the Gold on this one.
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an amazing response to the prompt offering an enlightening and thoughtprovoking interpretation through graceful and masterfully written verse ...
heartfelt congratulations on the well deserved gold ...
maa
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As always, your words are enlightening, thought provoking and a great pleasure to absorb. I am very thankful for the enjoyment of your gift and I would like to send my appreciation your way this day. Wishes of prosperity (Shefa) in all ways to you and your family this coming year. Love, onthebalcony
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I can't say whether the interpretaion is on target or not and that is subjective any way but I think your poem interprets the interpretaion in very meaningful and realistic way. As always, your rhyme and flow are to your usual high standard and your work is always a pleasure to read. I look forward to reading much more from you in 2008 and wish you all the best for a happy new year.
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No, not had a dream like that.
Excellent Writing
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wow...
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I think your interpretion is both interesting and feasable! Thanks for your entry!
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good luck in the contest. A wise poem. I have had many chain dreams.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS.
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