Oh my love
I determine to make you a segment of
my own affluence of the core
luring you into my mouthpieces
affirming that you are mine
and I shall not let you go anywhere
however every time like a divining
you arrive into my arms
I tie you into in my chest tensely
and while jetting a fluid of your adoration
you move away from the arms of mine
into the infinity
sometimes screaming and sometimes jubilating
Oh my love...
A contest entry
- River Lady (Image Inspired) by Idle Mind Wondering.
1500 points, ended January 12, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Sensual and alluring,
depicting the truth of love;
that by its nature, the act of possession dissipating the ethereal, love remains un-graspable.
well done
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...this is passion!
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Sensual
There is a warmth that flows softly through out this piece. The deeper one travels in this write the warmer and more connected to your vision they become.
luring you into my mouthpieces
affirming that you are mine
and I shall not let you go anywhere
I love the feel of need in the first line, possessiveness in the second, and the third expresses almost a vow - but an indication that you hold something so precious and so dear.
The following lines and words continue to touch many parts of my existence delightfully leaving tingles of creative expression lingering on my skin, a smile on my face, and a joy of nature in my heart.
So well done
!
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This is beautiful and the metaphor in incredible. Wonderful take on the picture prompt, the poem is as fluid as the photograph.
Love,
Amera♥
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excellent
This is the height of poetic imagination that tranforms life to a fairytale set in heaven. Congrats dear friend
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This poem is a very beautiful write you have put together here. You did a fabulous job with this as you have done with all the others of yours in which I have read so far. Keep up the wonderful work. I wish you the best in this contest and hope you'll have a very wonderful Christmas today.
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"...sometimes screaming and sometimes jubilating..."...this 'river' is so easy to fall into...I find this to be a loving poem full of human reactions and responses...I love the line:'I tie you into my chest intently'(my rewrite)...it has real drama and just great emotive quality...Best of luck in the contest. Peace, Rhonda
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Oh sweet friend of mine, what beauty you have woven with these words.. Totally full of love and passion.
Soulful Woman
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Woooow...what a poem...Your ending is so powerful..I am so impressed..this is really beautiful..great job my friend
Amarige
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