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The Art of Literature

        I am a question.
        I sit motionless,
        anticipating my destiny.
        Lost in translation,
        I seek my existence.

The parchment waits.
It's reality unknown.

        I am the artist.
        The sculptor of thought.
        The word of reason.
        With wisdom and purpose
        I paint an answer.

The quill moves
with eloquence and grace.

        I am your destiny.
        Bound by everything,
        and nothing.
        Like a wind of anew
        I imbed your meaning.

The ink flows,
while deep in reflection.

 

 

 

Author notes


A contest entry

Please be critical in your commentary on this piece. It will help me to understand the emotions my literature brings forth in free spirited individuals.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    January 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I was going to say this looked like a pow entry and indeed it was. Excellent poem Thank you for taking the time to enter into my contest.
    I wish you the best of luck.

    REDWINGSPIRIT


  • Jim Berkheiser
    December 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Writing about writing is an overdone theme. You need a lot of work on punctuation. I like you form and use of white space.

    I'm a tough grader.


    Clarity: 8.5

    Structure: 9.5
    (rhyme & meter)
    (line breaks & structure)

    Grammar: 10.0

    Punctuation: 3.0

    Use of Language: 6.0

    Poetic Value: 5.0

    Uniqueness: 4.0

    Impact: 4.0

    Theme: 5.0

    Title: 4.0

    Total: 59.0


  • Cupcrazy
    December 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A very lovely piece, captivating and thought provoking, I enjoyed this piece and wish you all the best in the contest. Hugs, Bunny


  • trista gold member
    December 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    While I'm not sure the theme you intended completely came through for me without the author notes, I found this impressive. It seemed more emphasis was put on the question, artist, and destiny than the parchment, quill, and ink, yet everything comes together so well it's a moot point.

    "Like a wind of anew"
    I'm not certain of your meaning here, but "anew" is an adverb but written like it's a noun. My suggestion is to take out the word "of". This would give you a meaning similar to "like a wind of something new" or "a new wind".

    I especially like the layout of your poem. As previously mentioned, it gives this a great visual appeal.

    I believe there are many areas of my scoreboard this will do exceptionally well in.

    Thank you for a wonderful read, and best of luck to you.
    ~J.


  • ZachP silver member
    December 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Dayyyyyyyyyum

     

    I can only reflect B. Chandler's thoughts

     

     

    The vis. appeal on this is much better.... I love how you broke the poem into clearly defined stanzas.... it helps the thoughts flow...

     

    You have truly set the bar high, dear poet.

     

    I'll just jump straight to the numbers.

     

    Good luck!!!

     

    * grammar - 9.9

    * syntax/flow - 9.8

    * understandability - 10

    * uncommon theme - 9.8

    * overall impression - 10

    * effectiveness of title - 9.85

    * ability to hook reader - 10

    * ability to follow rules - 10

    * presentation / visual appeal - 10

    * effective use of poetic devices - 9.8

    Total: 99.15

     

    Pas Mal!


  • B Chandler
    December 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Honestly, I've been stumped (left speechless)

    Punctuation: 9.9
    Flow: 10
    Readiability: 10
    Grammar: 9.9
    Overall: 10
    TOTAL: 49.8


  • Arkbear gold member
    December 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Superb Penning ~

    You took this Theme and made it your own ~

     

    Very creative indeed ~

     

    Loved how you took us on a journey and did not bore me once......nice grammatically chosen words to Impact this write ~

     

    Simple, yet full of Imagery, Impact, Thoughts, Focus....etc ~

     

    You have done well in this Round Poet......as I have just scored Both of your writes ~

     

    Way ta go ~

     

    As far as the Poem itself.........hmmmm.......well, there are some things which I could advice, but I really think your own version is so well done ~

     

    Good luck on the scoreboard,

     

    No editing......loved your Format and structure.....Title is about as good as it gets ~

     

    Nice job!

    ....I would have liked to have seen this in Round 2 ~

     

    Good luck with your entry and with your other Judges,

     

    Happy Holidays,

     

    Bear ~

     

     

    Title   9.95

    Flow   9.85

    Depth   9.9

    Theme   10

    Feelings   9.75

    Grammar   9.8

    Presentation 10

    Uncommonness  10

    Sit & Ponder Affect  9.8

    Ability to follow Rules  10

    Bears Score:   99.05

    Great job ~


  • islekine gold member
    December 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    I really like your way of expressing

    life, I will have to read more of your work! Best wishes in the contest...again!
    Write on...
    *PEACE ON EARTH*


  • Sonja
    December 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You are right. This poem is different, it has very interesting form and it carry your poetical strength and individuality.
    ~Sonja~


  • LadyDementia gold member
    December 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Again an awesome piece. Certainly gives me the ponder effect. I like the unanswered questions you leave here, who are they? What will they write? I also agree with below, the use of ink, parchment and quill is truly unique. You have penned this superbly, best of luck in the contest.
    Merry Christmas and a happy new year to you and yours


  • Tirrell
    December 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I like the view points of the ink, parchment and quill, this is unique to me, and yet fun at the same point. Bravo, and best of luck to you!


  • Darkend
    December 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Uniquely entertaining

    I really love how you took the guidelines of the contest and turned it into a topic. The imagery is refreshing. Well done.Best of luck!


  • Danneh
    December 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    It seems like three trains of thoughts, with two seperate ways of thinking? Uggh... I don't know how to say what I mean.

    Anyway... Good job here.

    Unique definitely.

    Almost question and answer style

    Anyway, good luck in the contest.

    -Danneh<3

1 - 13 of 13