I knew reflections
were not cast
in murky waters
or discovered when
huddled in the shadows
with eyes covered.
But still I drowned
in puddles of sin
and played hide-and-seek
with ghosts, naked,
hoping Reflection
would find me there.
In a list
A contest entry
- A Deep Thought, A Quick Contest by SoldierOfTheCross.
750 points, ended December 20, 2007, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This is great too, you write in images, as I do, maybe that's why I like it, hehe, impressive again,
well done,
Floorboards.
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Wow I love this...
Word usage and the piece itself is absolutely beautiful, flawless. I almost got shivers down my spine reading it. I would read it aloud, but I'm in science class right now, so that might not be a great idea...
I love your style--your profound thoughts are expressed in images that flow smoothly from one to the next. And your thoughts are never really defined--you could tae this piece to mean so much. Though I don't know exactly what you're trying to say, and won't attempt to define it, I feel like it speaks to my soul...
"But still I drowned
in puddles of sin"
Probably my favorite lines--each was perfect, though. A short piece, but each line there stood out wonderfully.
Very well penned, poet...
~QoA
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I'm not sure either
Very nice.
A great capture of the how we, as people, think we can handle life's problems. We're only shadows; feeble outlines of the Light shining on us. But what if we stay where the light can't reach us? I'm slowly learning self-pity doesn't produce results.
Self-pity doesn't show Reflection.
The one critque I have is the comma set in the second stanza, first line. I think that would help the flow.
But that's nitpicking.
I'm sure you this was a good piece.
*considering for finalist -
Forgot to applaud.
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Wow! This is a very deep thought. I love it.
~Amanda~
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Holy ****! A very deep thought indeed!
I may as well not even attempt that contest - wow...
Let me ruminate in this for a while; I'm sure I'll calm down eventually. Very spot on..
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I like this the best.
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