in the mouth of love,
i’m the river that drowns
the deepest
Author notes
12 words
In a list
A contest entry
- Who are you? by Naridill.
300 points, ended December 18, 2007, 33 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Longing to read SILVER by Lavender Butterfly.
390 points, ended March 18, 2008, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 60 of 60
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Love should always be a place in which to drown and be erased. Another short one that packs a punch here. It's hard for me to get that much weight packed into few words.
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Nicolette
This was beautiful.
Your gift is remarkable and memorable.
Thank you for sharing this.
Best
Love Peace
campanaro
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thank you - you are so kind to me
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in the mouth of love,
i’m the river that drowns
the deepest
This was amazing, so stark and full of meaning. It gave me a one, two punch. Congratulations on the gold.
Marlene -
(lol)
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Stunning. Your words pack so much!!! Well done dear!
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the void passes with a word, uttered from the very lips of the ocean, that for so long intocxicated me to its love, such gorgeous depth ....
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Sigh....
Incredible.
You didn't tell me you had published a book Nicolette. Humph!
Congrats. I am going to see if I can purchase a copy.
Happy new year poet XXX -
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lolol
... thanks, Sonia and a happy new year to you too, poet!!
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The words are so simple but the thoughts are not.
Great write.
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What tremendous expression! I love the image and the simplicity. The words are sparse, but the meaning, the depths, are without question. Quite beautifully done.
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So simple, so short, so true.
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Thank you for the visit and the applause....
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Nicolette, do you realize that a black hole can't prevent love? Such power it holds!!! That which is most profound is also the most simple. It should surprise us that we make such a mess of it.
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I know about black holes and I know about love... so you are right, as always, dear Karen. Thank you, my friend
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who then will float? awesome 12 words crafted with great significance...nicely crafted.
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Thank you - best wishes for 2008!
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of course you are....
another beauty from you...
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Wow, for a twelve word poem, this sure hits hard. The image that I get in my head while reading this is just as powerful. Thanks for being the catalist for and awesome image!
Great work! -
You managed to get those thoughts and images into a 12 word space very well.
Congratulations on your silver trophy. -
More than perfect!
I already read it without comment, than came back, still with no proper words, and it is the same. In my humble opinion this is the best of your best.
~Sonja~
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Thank you, Sonja - I appreciate your kind words, my friend.
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You pull us right into your words...and as always, they are breathtaking.
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sorry for all that problems.
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Lovely. To the point, metaphorical, and sweet - exactly like you! I love the imagery concentrated in these 12 words. The craft in this is obvious.
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Its your enhancement of emotion with brevity that takes my breath away, this says so much without the need to trip over words. Brilliantly penned. Love, C
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Thank you, dear one...so good to see you again
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No, I am!
You make sorrow Sing, Scribe.
~ Nicky♥
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Lolol, Nicky - guess it's because we have the same name. I see you have a new author's name...
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Yeah, that must be it. and the new name, seems to fit my mood, at this time, in time ...Sighhh.
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I wouldn't mind drowning here...
This is timeless Nic
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I loved your answer to this question.
Congrats on the silver.
What's not to love.
This is brilliant.
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whoah!
beautifully, deeply, intensely heartfelt
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The levels this piece creates is stunning. Especially since you did it with such brevity. I love this one.
e~
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you are probably one of the deepest woman I have ever meet, full of wisdom, and full of love, and you know in the mouth of love we are either a sweet word or a cruel insult.
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Thank you, Leslie - what a lovely comment. Yes, we are either the bitter or the sweet - or bittersweet!
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I tumbled through your words..
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Oh wow. How DiD spearated Gold and Silver here is beyond me - fantastic work hun!
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reading this was realative to me...though my version to it came simple...
in the mouth
of love's river
I lay deepest
on it's bed
Love your poem nicchi...congratulations on Silver!
you girls awe me...you mary and zayra..
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Thanks, Mally - loved your version of it too - that's the other, more nicer side of being the river or being in the river!
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These snippets have that something, that one could keep on thinking and pondering upon them...
There's just so much in those few words you write my friend...
truly brilliant!
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Images work so well here, Nicolette. Bravo.
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This is beautiful, leaves me in awh and also with a sigh. Very intriguing and reflects with such passion over you.
Thanks for entering.
Much luck.
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Besides absolutely loving the entire piece, there are two particular things that I have to give you kudos for in this poem. First, the linking of river and drowning with the word mouth - very inspired, since rivers have mouths and drowning happens through the mouth. Very clever, and I loved it. Second, I very much applaud the fact that you used a river and not a lake or ocean, since rivers imply motion and change and a certain restlessness that seems to work well for both love in general and you in particular. And after all of that, I suppose my rambling was just my way of saying that you are a damn fine poet and I will never grow tired of reading your work.
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twelve words, my goodness!...PK
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If one was to look up the true meaning of "beauty" in the dictionary, surely there would be a link to your poetry! My goodness, dear one, this is absolutely magnificent! Such wondrous depth....so much feeling, and the metaphors are perfection. ohhhhh...to spend but an hour inside your mind... Stunning, my dear friend, simply STUNNING!
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It can be perfect and to the point -like a sharp incision that isn't even felt....too perfect in fact with such few words...you're amazing words.
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Excellent. How can you write so brlliantly? I'm envious!
Great work, lady.
~Namita
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Outstanding.
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soothing, very soothing, the kind of 'deep' one hopes for in life and love, beautiful write.
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.....wonderful brevity, always what I enjoy about your succinct poems..a beautiful title and message..
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This is brilliant. Woorde is diep en betekenisvol. Good luck with your entry. Frans
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I'll give ya that...
You and your Poetry are always DEEP...
with meaning!
Poignant, Poet.
~ Nicky♥
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Great poem. Nice work for so few words.
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so much said~ perfect.
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and you drown so beautifully my vriendin.
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Don't worry, I'll save ya, Sweetie!!! Completely beautiful & visceral, my dear Friend. Good luck in the contest. Dammmnnn, you're good. Vlindertjie
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Absolutely beautiful..
and yes, you drown in each emotion and then write it..
beautiful
m
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