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pennies in pocket tossed to save stitch

I'm not
flying but shake
my insect parts like dog
does its fur that's gotta be spent...
dampness

Author notes

cinquain

may edit from persona to third person --
all back to their energy interfered in likely time

ACTUALLY IF YOU DON'T LIKE THIS, I can take it out and re-enter if you'd allow with one I just wrote that might have more immediacy for enjoyment!




good luck isn't integral

please don't use emoticons or the applause, just your sentences

A contest entry

higher in air than jump

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Comments


  • azure85 gold member
    December 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I'm not
    flying but shake
    my insect parts like dog
    does its fur that's gotta be spent...
    dampness

    I am thinking on this one, I think it is refering to trying out your "wings" and learning something new. In reference to your title, you could be throwing the pennies in the fountain, making a wish. But then, you may be spending them on lots of good stuff too. I shall return to this one, it is a good one to think about many times.


    • also called
      December 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      I have to take a day off and get overview of winners of all I've entered!

      azure85 loops of brightness

      I thank you for bearing with my attempt, actuakky made from a silly answer [to my daughter] as from gnat communication getting out of somewhere (sticky) but semi so explained as momentary puppet. but I could see how the flappable speech could lend itself to popular comparison for novice of fledging occurences.

      and I suppose similar connotative evoking could take place with my token reference of this piece. I was literally paralelling getting rid of an iffy coin from a weak pocket to maintain strength... the way a dog releases refreshing water even on hot day happy dip because its heavy for step possibly. so the burst of one creature trying to regain flight was floating fumbly as just trying to simplify for a walk! Sorry if I had too much to think about lol.

      In the frame of mind not to fix this one when fearing it might go in too many directions, I just stayed in cinquain momentum and wrote another with inspiration's night. resulting with http://allpoetry.com/poem/3716528 if you're interested with what I think is tighter.

      thanks for the contest to guage such things,
      also called


  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    December 16, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very interesting I like it.
    Thought Provoking Write

    • also called
      December 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      I'd like to connect to a smile

      PoovyLou okay with

      thanks for getting a handful of thought ha-ha out of this.

      you might be interested in a rendition more mamma :
      adventure of growing up
      I see
      a tween girl with
      handlebars at her hips,
      she bends into the scooter soon
      tiny

      I saw limestone in flagstone as to sharpen wood for pencil,
      also called