Getting all pretty for someone that will never show.
All dressed up, nowhere to go.
Hair in dark locks, no one to see.
Lips glossed for the perfect, kiss that will never be.
Memories that were never experienced.
Tears fall from her perfectly dressed eye’s.
The dress of her dreams, re hung and stuck in the back of the closet.
Shoes never worn, put back in the box to never be seen again.
Now a broken girl, dreams of her perfect night she was yet to see.
The perfect dance that never happened.
The walk that was never made.
She’s only dreaming of her prom that was never meant to be.
But what she thought about was not meant to be
The visit of death she brought about
It was yet to be
It was not her that was next in line
Even though she new she was loved she still made the leap
She swallowed them all
The whole bottle
As they all took her piece by piece
Her life slipped away
Slowly letting go
911 was called but they arrived just to late
She was not meant to come back
But what she was never told
Her date that was to show and take her to where she dreamed to be
And look upon her as his little queen for this perfect night
He lost all control
The tires slipped and slid only to come to a stop
With the swift visit of death he was the next in line
as her life sliped to no return he was soon to follow
Now they lie side by side forever and always
the stone formed uin to 2 hearts side by side
it reads
Young lovers to die on this one perfect night
He was buried in his perfect suit
She was buried in her perfect dress
Young lovers at heart
For ever and always
Author notes
idk why i wrote this but i did
A contest entry
- The Form of Love by Perfectly Imperfect.
450 points, ended January 4, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~ SET the BAR ~ Anything Goes~ Possible of 5750 points handed out! by Florida Sunshine.
950 points, ended February 24, 2008, 182 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaah, it almost has that Romeo and Juliet kind of feel ~ in the story ~ they weren't supposed to die~ perception of a situation makes it hard on anyone to understand there could be other explainations on why someone doesn't show up or come~
I enjoyed reading the poem ~ just a couple of easy fix'es ~ (I added em cause its was just simple errors) I still clearly understood what you meant though~
2nd line Reads:
"All dressed up, know where to go."
Should be: "All dressed up, nowhere to go."
and
2nd stanza 2nd line reads:
"The visit of death she broght about"
Sould be: "The visit of death she brought about"
Just FYI~
Thanks for entering the "Set the bar" contest ~ it was my pleasure having you ~ good luck to you
-
aaaaaaaaaaaaaah, it almost has that Romeo and Juliet kind of feel ~ in the story ~ they weren't supposed to die~ perception of a situation makes it hard on anyone to understand there could be other explainations on why someone doesn't show up or come~
I enjoyed reading the poem ~ just a couple of easy fix'es ~ (I added em cause its was just simple errors) I still clearly understood what you meant though~
2nd line Reads:
"All dressed up, know where to go."
Should be: "All dressed up, nowhere to go."
and
2nd stanza 2nd line reads:
"The visit of death she broght about"
Sould be: "The visit of death she brought about"
Just FYI~
Thanks for entering the "Set the bar" contest ~ it was my pleasure having you ~ good luck to you
-
As I got to the middle of this I was thinking that it wasn't really what I was looking for, but the end was perfect and changed my mind. I really like it
Well done and thank you for entering x
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this is the sweetest and saddest poem i have read in days it is beautiful and very heartfelt... your doing a great job keep up the good work!!
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Not Bad but some of the lines just seem to not fit properly if you get what I mean. Like
:
But what she thought about was not meant to be the visit of death she thought about
that lines seems out of place a bit.
Overall though a good piece and a nice story in there. Very Interesting.
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