Fabricated horizons, hollographic visions.
I see you're dead behind those smiles, while i remain absoloute.
Or was it the other way around?
Stretch imagination and step through the other side.
Alive alive!
Euphoria surrounds, enfolds.
Soon to break, vaccum of denial which i did not care to acknowledge.
Cracks leak cacophonies,
and i claw at the inside of my own mind.
Screaming release
From my synthetic nightmare.
A contest entry
- Synthetic Nightmares- A group exclusive by GFP Vault.
2700 points, ended January 5, 2008, 5 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I tried guys, i tried.
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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i like it...but i don't. not to be mean, but it's definitely one of those pieces to grow on me. i mean i have tastes that can clearly be questioned, regardless of me attempts to come off as sane.
good luck in the contest! -
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I don't mind if you don't like it! You're entitled to your opinion after all.
(And taste is all subjective don't forget)
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Good good job dear poet!
oh..I adore..how you pulled us in right away and just
capture us! Good job! I really enjoyed this poem,
it had a good wicked flow to it. You pulled us into
the emotional state and conflict of it.
good good job!
ears2hearyou
Kathleen : ))
we're all learning and wrestling with structures,
just find one that works easily for you. I don't
mind this structure at all, it lets the words do
the work!
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You went a very different route than I think I would have gone. I like it though. I'm not thrilled with the layout, but the imagery is fantastic.
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Thank you!
Yes i suppose the layout if a bit lacking, it's something i never really give thought to.
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i hope you win ! you definately should, well thats what i think . write some more i love reading them xXx
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Aw thank you babes!
*much love
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