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All Silk Eats Its Own

 

 

 

 

 
Pecking at shiny frogs to pass dead days,
the raven seizes each season in claw-
twists them around a cocoon whose shimmer
caught her eye,
that cup of blemish spilled
within thread,
waiting for princess-wings

to rise from the silk of the dying:
to feast,

to swallow a butterflys kisses
and in return
to be consumed heart-first.
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? • Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Naridill gold member
    December 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Honestly, am thankful for comments below.

    This is absolutely beautiful and mesmerising.
    Gorgeous phrasing & tanting personal touches.

    Thanks for entering.
    Much luck.

  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    December 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "Pecking at shiny frogs to pass dead days,"

    makes me think of princes, you kiss a frog to make a prince. Perhaps this relates to TG issues. Pecking at former self before he is gone, dead days being the days while you wait.

    "the raven seizes each season in claw-
    twists them around a cocoon whose shimmer
    caught her eye,"

    The raven makes me think of those dark voices actually, perhaps it is because of the seizing in claws, but that is where I go with the raven, maybe the seasons are moments from past, histories that tend to stay and visit... and the twisting them around cocoons to me seems like a suffocation of sorts.

    "that cup of blemish spilled
    within thread,
    waiting for princess-wings

    to rise from the silk of the dying:"

    Duh. This is very clearly a TG statement, not sure I really need to explain it. Let me know

    "to swallow a butterflys kisses
    and in return
    to be consumed heart-first."

    This one seems to have dual meanings. Swallowing butterfly's kisses almost feels like becoming. Becoming the butterfly, metamorphosis. But the second bit there, well, can't imagine who you want consuming you heart-first

    I like the depth in these words. Not a lot of words here, but definitely a lot of meaning.




    • EvilKate gold member
      December 14, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      Wow. What a fantabulously in-depth comment! Thank you - and yes, you have deciphered the riddle I think

      of course, I have no idea regarding the heart-first part either

      LOL!


  • rebeka
    December 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply


    i can't see the image but the poem is fantastic. i was given a little brooch pin once, an silver frog with emerald eyes, magical frog, magical poetry..this one has a really savage feel underneath the pretty butterfly kisses.


  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    December 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply


    I really like being consumed heart-first. Great line!

    This is an interesting twist on the image, too, not quite so blatant as mine, which I like

    Good luck!



  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    December 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    yeah I wanted 13 too, but it was gone and then I wanted 7 but that was gone too!! LOL

  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    December 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I own 13.


    • EvilKate gold member
      December 14, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Feh! I'm older and was ALSO born on the 13th remember. Have some respect for your elders
1 - 9 of 9