Goodbye, 2007. Farewell!
I've indulged in way too much sin.
The pain, the fear, the height from which I fell,
They all stare me in the eye as I climb again.
Now I'm in a brand new place.
new people, new beginnings, an open door.
But I stand here in disgrace,
wanting and hoping for a little bit more.
So I've moved away from what I loved,
but I've climbed this mountain and survived.
I may have lost some faith in the above,
But I have mananged to build a new life.
Author notes
2. Write about an obstacle you faced this year and overcame
A contest entry
- 2007: In Retrospect (NEW OPTIONS ADDED) by Metaphorist.
600 points, ended December 30, 2007, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Your new beginning works much better! Thanks for considering my suggestion.
Good luck. -
This gave me a negative first impression based on that first line. Thankfully, it got better. I liked the last 2 lines in the first stanza and the ending. But, I'd consider reworking the opening line.
Thanks for entering. -
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thanks for the honest critique.
I reworked it just for you =p
please tell me if you don't like it =)
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very very good little one...
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