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Bloody tears

Bloody tears is what I cry
Bloody tears stain my cheeks
Bloody tears fill my eyes
Bloody tears are what I cry
Bloody tears Bloody tears
I cry tears of blood
Blody tears bloody tears
Bloody tears flow from my hazel eyes
I cry bloody tears for the ones I losed.
Bloody tears Bloody tears.

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Comments


  • Blazor
    December 13, 2007

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    Too telling

    The image of bloody tears is so powerful. Don't just tell us what it does, describe it. They fill your eyes, how? Describe that moment right before they are too much for your eyes to hold anymore. Your cheeks are stained, there's more to that sentence that needs exploration. Even something as little as changing the title will add to the interpretation. The title right now is a label, it doesn't prepare us for the poem. Let this image explode like it should. No reservations, you owe nothing to the person who made these red tears fall, let them know the truth.


  • XxBlack ivoryxX
    December 13, 2007
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    nice

    I think its really good