PART ONE: THE USA
City centres deserted every night
Except for the thieves, muggers and rapists.
Obese families in suburban homes
Staring at the mindless pap and lies on TV.
Soldiers marauding in the Middle East
Earning more enemies for your nation.
Stars and stripes flying in the foetid wind
How proud are you of America?
PART TWO: GREAT BRITAIN
City centres an urban battleground every night
Peopled by drunkards, muggers and junkies.
Obese families in suburban homes
Staring at reality shows and crap on TV.
Soldiers fighting pointlessly in the Middle East
Earning more enemies for my betrayed nation.
Union Jack flying in the foetid wind
How proud am I of Britain today?
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Author notes
The first poem of this pair was deleted, not so much for its content but because it attracted some very vicious comments from alleged "patriots" and I retaliated in kind. The mods agreed to my re-posting it and I undertook not to retaliate viciously to ignorant comments. So if you want to make a stupid criticism, save your breath.
A contest entry
- Freedom Of Speech by jcat.
700 points, ended December 23, 2007, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
If you wish to comment, please be polite and I shall reciprocate.
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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But you don't go far enough
in assigning blame.
There is plenty to go around.
Complacent citizens who have theirs and couldn't care less if someone else suffers deprivation.
Greedy business owners whose only metric of success is profit regardless of the cost to future generations.
"Public servants" whose sole aim is to accrue prestige and power.
Those who who remain silent instead of decrying widespread injustice, the "silent" majority whose only interest is themselves.
Yep. Plenty of blame. More than enough to choke humanity on its crimes against the powerless.
Maybe those who say Mother Earth would be better off without the affliction of Humankind are right. We've certainly fouled our nest. Maybe beyond repair.
Ladies and Gents, it's going to be quite a bumpy ride for some time to come. Prepare for the worst, and don't say you weren't warned.
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Excellent
I'm not much of a critical type of person but i do realize that these countries have taken for granted their "power" for so long and it's all starting to backfire on them...history repeating itself over and over again...the people in power have gotten to cocky and the PEOPLE are suffering because of it...excellent and powerful write...i love it!
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Well I have No Problem....
with your self expression, however If you read my rules it says only poems of tribute to AMerica! I coudn't care less about Brittain or any other country as far as this contest goes. So I will be deleting this not because of your lack of patriotism but rather it is NOT what I asked for in the contest rules and you may go back and re-read them if you think otherwise...Thanks for netering anyways but it may be better served in one of the many contest that bash AMerica -
thanks for joining the contest
take care -
I have already commented on this but I think it's worth a revisit!
At first sight one might think this is merely prose broken up artificially into lines - a device beloved of the illiterate and artistically challenged. And perhaps there is a little bit of truth in that charge. However there is quite a little touch of the old iambic pentameters in many of the lines and the language has a definite poetic feel to it.
I appreciate the fact that the piece is in two matching parts - reading through the outraged comments on the attack on the US contained in part one indicates it hit home on many an occasion. Part two (an equally savage attack on the UK) is a nice counter-balance to show the writer is even-handed in his bitternesss. And the similarity of the wording in each stanza emphasises the similar culpability of the two great betrayed nations, nations betrayed by their discredited leaders.
And the similar endings on rhetorical questions is excellent: how proud are Americans of their cruel nation and how ashamed is the writer of his own nation's involvement in war and hypocrisy? -
It's all too true.
I'd love to read the first part. Can you message it to me?
Elizabeth
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These poems aren't offensive, and they have nothing to do with politics. Rather, they deal with how much society has come to suck in the last fifty years or so. Big difference there.
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This is sick. You dont know how lucky you are to live in the Land of the Free and not in some Commie Hellhole!
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THE TRUTH IS WRITTEN HERE.
Never a truer word said. This IS the truth. Our politicians have left us deep in it. Blair has retired leaving a nation open to terrorist attack, when America was big enough to stand on Her own two feet. And Bush, and his Administration has caused nothing but mayhem. Between them [Bush and Blair] they have murdered countless innocents [not to mention the deaths of hundreds upon hundrends of their own military people,] in a meaningless war that nobody believes in. And,all for what?... OIL, pure and simple.
In the meantime, the countries are going to rack and ruin. Gun crime in the UK has ROCKETED among the young. Knife crime has ROCKETED among the young. Streets are crime-ridden dens of war-zone proportions. And the people are scared to move out of their own homes. The politicians have, indeed, forgotten us. Those in power need to hang their heads in shame. FOR IT IS THE PEOPLE THAT GAVE THEM THE POWER IN THE FIRST PLACE, AND CAN TAKE IT AWAY.
YOU HAVE WRITTEN THE TRUTH.
WELL DONE MY MAN
WAYNE LEON.
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I think these problems are real, are happening, but on the actual scale of these problems is usually exagerrated...(sic?) our cities have always had people fighting killing and robbing in them, we have always got troops in another country doing something they probably shouldn't. and well this obese thing is becoming a bit of a problem!!
i like this poem for the above reason, i arnt really commenting on this contest, just reading, but poems like this force a comment! -
Why did this upset people?? Cause they can't handle the truth??? See this is what I am talking about!!! You write something and someone doesn't agree and they go all juvenille on you and whine to the mods to get it removed!!! I say stand up and be HEARD!!! I love this and thank you for entering it!!
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Thank you for the 2nd prize and the points.
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Oh. This is an interesting poem that you have here.
I don't seen enough political poems these days. But I guess that's probably because people just don't want to face the ugliness anymore. I did think it was interesting how you used the same kinds of things to show the similarities between these two nations. It was almost like you were saying that these two nations alone make or break everything.
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Wel
My take on this is that i'd rathere have those two flags flying around then something with a cresent on it & i would still,when in NYC, wish I could see the WTC. but you know what some arab terrorist blew it up & killed 3000 poeople
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And my take on your comment is that you can't spell "crescent" can you? And you should reflect that the reason why "some arab terrorist" (an A for Arab by the way) destroyed the WTC was that the Arab world has had enough of American persecution of Islam, and more than enough of US support for the Israeli invaders of Palestine. Until the USA stops its aggression in the Middle East, this situation will continue.
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This is the truth.
It's sad, and I am patriotic, but the moral decline of these countries is getting out of control.
Sometimes I wish we could revert to our old moral values.
this poem was very thought evoking!
great write!
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Pretty realistic.
Gee! It's like ancient Rome-except we don't feed people to the lions.Not literally, anyway.When ancient Rome became lazy and partied and bacame very immoral, she fell. I guess we all need to pray for our countries.There is alot of negativity, but I think if we all turn to God, we can turn around. -
I am delighted to see this has re-surfaced and I shall give it a little boost in my caring, sharing way.
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A piece of frightening reality that should be posted anywhere our morally declining uninterested "celebrity" apeing wazzoks exist - not much good as a large percentage can't read!(UK government statistics reveal this) I just hope that THE THOUGHT POLICE DON'T REMOVE YOUR WORDS.
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