Sunken,
As the quicksand engulfs my being,
I scream,
In despair, surrounded by desolate faces.
Like shattered windows,
Their broken stares,
Outline my flailing,
Seemingly overlooking my S.O.S.
I grasp at the ground.
It disappears beneath my fingers,
Falling as rapidly,
As my weight beneath me.
Plenty of hands reach out,
Only in a nonchalant effort.
A reason to say they tried,
Yet no one is truly offering help.
I can feel the ever growing,
Grip around my neck,
Strengthen.
I cry out in desperate shrieks.
No one hears me.
And I suffocate
Under the pressure,
Of being shoved aside.
Author notes
"Things we lost in the fire"
A contest entry
- Things we lost in the fire... by Jai Guru Deva.
500 points, ended January 26, 2008, 85 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Almost Anything Goes by bloodletter68.
300 points, ended March 13, 2008, 132 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
I think this is my favorite poem so far. You did amazingly in captivating the emotions I asked for and using awesome imagery. Quicksand was a very nice touch. Definitely a finalist. Thank you so much for the wonderful entry.
Good job and good luck. All my love, DxD -
So Sad, Yet So Beautiful
This is so Sad yet so beautiful. You have written something very special here, the way you have managed to put into words a feeling that so many people have experienced and with your words transformed this feeling into something more tangible that the reader of your poem can experience as well. A really, really good poem. Well done !! I wish you All Good Luck in the contest. All my very best wishes from Rose xxx
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