pour -
when the pollen is cold,
green like leaves,
like the soft voice of spring,
pour me into them;
I shall grow, young as the grass,
from Scandinavian language,
from dark realms of earth
rich with the scent of your skin -
I shall grow from a promise
that I will not remember poetry
until you paint my hair -
part empty, part moon,
part emerald evening
pour -
pour me from where your eyes begin,
your eyes of green foliage
that lays broken on my belly,
that tickles me under my chin
Author notes
green is the color of youth
etymology of the word green - Scandinavian
In a list
- for you • next in list
- Possibilities for AP Book 2 • next in list
- AP - Some poems of my favorite poets • next in list
A contest entry
- AP Book Contest: Get Published! (Last Chance!) by tinuelena.
1200 points, ended December 12, 2007, 53 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please give some honest and constructive criticism -
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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I am back to read this poem again. Yes, green is the word of youth and I fell so green too.
this poem goes to my special list of the best poets and poetry.
~Sonja~ -
I love the connection between the title and the rest of the poem. Amazing imagery. The last lines would have to be my favorite.
Thank you for entering my contest.
Always,
Cassie
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Very interesting. I've never read anything like this before. On a scale from one to ten I'd give it a 7. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!!!
Megan -
absolutely adore this, well done on the gold.
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Green wind, green branches, I want you green - Federico Lorca - indeed you are great company with this green poem - an emerald one. I love what you did here with green... the sound of spring!!! And the emeralds reminded me of Neruda. I'm sitting here smiling because I'm actually working on a poem with a similar theme. Congrats on the gold, Namita - this is beautiful and an example of your talent. Congratulations too on being published in the AP 2nd book - now you have your foot in the door - the next one will be your own book!!!
~ Nicolette
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Thank you for this.
I knew this was going to get a trophy the moment I read it. Such fresh subject matter, simplistic and vivid language-- this is a gem of a piece.
'that I will not remember poetry
till you paint my hair -'
Amazing line. I might suggest 'until,' as this seems to be more of a formal freeverse, but that's just my humble opinion.
Well done, and thank you.
Elizabeth -
Magnificent! I like the pouring of this in every drop of it. You are truly a gifted child Namita.
I wish the wonder of this will be published
Thanks for sharing such an excellent piece.
VIRGOAN
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What an incredible poet you are...simply stunning writing...stunning pen friend.
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pour me more...
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beautiful ending...I love that..I love the title, such creativity from your quill..always...excellent poem!
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What a beautiful poem. The whole thing was so enchanting, I was never bored for a moment. It really draws you in, and gives you everything you hoped for out of it.
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Amazing!
You already wrote many nice verses, but this poem, in my modest opinion was the best one, leaving me with open mouth, without breath till the end and leaving those special feelings of satisfaction - yes, this is real poetry.
~Sonja~
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