My chance is slim, but thinner more is need,
To give me none would be a smaller waste.
No more am I a slave to lust and greed,
For nothing more than air is to my taste.
A plate of treachery to feed my guilt,
I crave what I want not, but does sustain.
Alone, my starving will does weep and wilt,
And I succumb to weakness, thrill and gain.
Betrayed by what I wish to do without,
My body, sick and tainted by my sin.
I'll exorcise the imperfection out,
And purge the wickedness that lies within.
A bowl of doubt is duly flushed away,
But still, I'll weigh my sins another day.
Author notes
Written for a contest that I was originally going to pass by until a couple of lines popped into my head, and I decided to continue.
It's in the form of a Shakespearean sonnet, one which I'm not so familiar with, but as I like trying out new things, it was an interesting experience (and I must say, I do like having 10 syllables a line!)
One of my dearest friends has been battling anorexia for the past couple of years and is now, thankfully on the road to recovery. This is mostly based around what she used to tell me about her ED, and various journal posts about her thoughts and feelings. Again, much darker than I'm used to writing. Must be the weather.
A contest entry
- So far from perfection.... by Madison Mary.
300 points, ended January 3, 2008, 13 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Congratulations
A great job on this and a well deserved gold for you. They rhyming was excellent and the iambic pentameter very well done. If this was your first sonnet, make sure it's not your last. You may well have a talent for them.
Best wishes in your future writing.
Paul
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wow,i have to agree, this is worth the gold, really touched me in so many way, each line was almost to painful to read! very well done!!!
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A deeper feeling rages through this poem. Great work.
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Killer stuff, at any rate. Then again, what else would anyone expect?
Great one.
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You never stop amazing me. You remind me of Stephen Friar (I think thats his name and sort of how to spell it), in that your knowledge and more importantly energy to aquire it seems limitless. A tricky topic but wonderful poem. Hope you win.
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Very good sonnet. That's my favourite type of poetry. Very powerful and fits the title. Well done and keep writing. Good luck
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So truthful, so amazing
This is such ana azimzing poem. You really capture it, im sorry to hear about your friend. But you really have done her pain justice. great write.
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