what's within a black hole?
it's where all lost things go
mortals lose and vaccuum claims
everything, for loss or gain
a black hole isn't empty and cold
it's quite a sight to behold
just use your imagination and
the universe is at your command
what do you imagine lurks
behind those corners,or those giant pieces of work?
can you think of who has lost this thing
that we discovered, hidden, that luck decided to bring?
just imagine with your whole mind
all the treasures that you could find
so think originally and don't hold back
so it seems, cold doesn't always bring the color black
A contest entry
- What's Within a Black Hole? by aslanlight.
600 points, ended December 30, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I just wrote you a long and well thought out comment and when I submitted it there was an error and I lost it! Do you think it's in your Black Hole and if you find it can you read it? lol I was basically saying that I like that you see Black Holes in a positive light as I do and that you encourage the reader to use his/her imagination (that is what my contest's about, who's running it anyway? lol). These lines confused me and could be clearer:
'...can you think of who has lost this thing
that we discovered, hidden, that luck decided to bring?'
Overall I admire the warm touch you give to the subject; Black Holes are after all natural and I assume necessary parts of our universe and shouldn't be frightening or alien to us.
Peace Georgia
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This write is a "make one think" type piece!!! I like that in a piece!!!!! I enjoyed this read!!! Good attention holder.............. Best wishes in the contest!!!!!!!!!!!!
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very nice writer here, your choice of words was very good, nice rhyme scheme you used, the (taking your words sry) thought behind the poem, and its meaning, are a very nice touch on, lovely write, that was wonderfully written, (^.^)
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Me gusta!
lmao. Black holes are cool. I really like it. I've always wondered what is behind it. Lets chuck you in so we can see. lol jk maybe. No seriously jk. But yes, anyways back to the subject, your poem is good
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