I've travelled a lot around the galaxies
In many kinds of craft
But only once did I happen upon
A Black Hole.
It wasn't what I thought.
I'm not sure they're all the same
But this particular one
Is a trendy watering hole
Which caters to sentient beings
From across the universe
The walls are black of course
And it's huge
Just like you'd expect,
All chrome and starkness
And drinks from everywhere.
There were a lot of guys there
Male sentient beings.
I got hit on by many of them,
One Vulcan in particular.
But that's another story
Ladies don't kiss and tell.
Not this lady anyway.
I am wellplaced in Startrek Command
And it pays to be discreet.
A contest entry
- What's Within a Black Hole? by aslanlight.
600 points, ended December 30, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - GET NOTICED!!!! by Nighttime angel.
625 points, ended January 13, 2008, 88 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Everything you want! by xxvampyregirlxx.
490 points, ended December 20, 2008, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What do you like best about this piece?
Comments
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hmm very intresting. I love the last stanza the best!
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I liked this poem, you did a great job on writing this.I liked the last stanza a lot.
good luck in the contest.
kat
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Hummmm interesting. I like the idea and it could be developed, especially if you removed the Startrek influence and make it unique; you could invent people. I wasn't expecting the inside of a Black Hole to be a bar and like the imagery of starkness and chrome. It gives a futuristic type feel.
'It wasn't what I thought.
I'm not sure they're all the same'
You could improve these lines, something like:
It was unexpected
They all seem to be unique
Peace Georgia
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Very unique and different a rendition of the old "black hole"... Best wishes in the contest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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