On a white horse He came-
the one answer-the key,
with sword and with flame.
He calls the good by name,
and all others try to flee
before He states their blame.
On a white horse He came,
shining light on the debris,
making demons feel their shame
with sword and with flame.
He does not hear their plea,
but He takes his aim...
On a white horse he came,
sending all to bended knee,
and then He exclaims-
with sword and with flame-
His voice stronger than the sea.
On a white horse he came,
with sword and with flame.
Author notes
This poem is a villanelle, with the rhyme scheme as this:
line 1 a
b
line 3 a
a
b
a
a (repeat line 1)
b
a
a (repeat line 3)
b
a
a (line 1)
b
a
a (line 3)
b
a (line 1)
a (line 3)
A contest entry
- Based on Christ by C.o.g..
1200 points, ended December 14, 2007, 15 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Here's where you tell me if it's good or bad:
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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An astonishingly good form poem ... I salute you!! Absolutely splendid.
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good job
This poem will encourage all to check their lives to be sure they are ready to meet the Lord when He again returns to earth to claim his own. Good write -
A beautiful villanelle, but even more so; a beautiful look into the future. I love it! Thank you for sharing it. Glad you got a mention on this piece.
Sam
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Awesome poem!
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A beautiful write and message. Good imagery, flow, rhyme and tone. Lovely depth of feeling. Good descriptives, word choice, nice alliteration and assonance. Well penned and much enjoyed.
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Love your poem and your title caught my eye. It is very true Jesus came and will be coming again and I can't wait. God bless loved your poem!
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