I've got an ugly face with spots all over the place,
I haven't got any mates and my clothes have gone out of date,
I go to the pub on my own and drink my orange alone
I sit and stare at the crack, but they just turn their backs
I want to chat them up, but I stare at my feet,
Then I go home and I beat my meat,
I'm dead shy about the size of my dick
And chips n gravy make me sick
I'm a failure with girls -I don't know why
I'm a failure with girls -they make me cry
I'm a failure with girls -they're so unkind
Only wish I could say that I don't mind
A Macc Lad said: 'Sonny, take note!'
And he poured a pint of bitter down my throat,
It was the first pint I'd ever had, and I turned into a real Macc Lad,
My clothes started looking real flash, I grew a tattoo and a moustache
And my car grew a go-faster stripe,
Now I pull crack every night
I'm not weak anymore, my dick measures 3'4",
Don't you call me wimp-
Its 3'4" even when its limp
I'm dead macho with girls - I never fail
I'm dead macho with girls - Coz I sup ale
I'm dead macho with girls - Thanks to Boddies
Only wish that I didn't have VD
A contest entry
- I Need Some Pick Me Ups by di ivers.
600 points, ended December 20, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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I have set myself the horrid task of reading all your poems. When I see things like this, I realise how foolish I am, never mind it's another 4 points.
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What do chips and gravy have to do with the size of your dick? Maybe you're a failure with girls because you force your rhymes?
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1- it is a song from the viewpoint of someone else
2- forced? what you on about
3- piss off -
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Don't enter any more of my contests then
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If your happy about having a 3 footer then so be it but i would have to agree on the previous statement cause i would be scared crapless and would litterally run away from one that size.thank you for entering my contest.....good luck
~~DI~~ -
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you look ok do you fancy going halves on a bastard?
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TOO-BIG-TO-BELIEVE
Let us believe that your dick is more than 3ft, but won't that scare away the girls? Do something about it and do it soon otherwise you will be a complete failure with the girls. Or should we read inches in place of ft? In either case your case is totally hopeless. Instead of laughing I feel like crying for you, poor chap! But I must admit you have presented your case very well indeed. -
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how tall are you?
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macciadd
Request you to read my poem MY DISEASE posted on this site. -
Dear macciadd, this question you should ask the girls who ran away from me.
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Hysterical!
give me more....
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