Charlotte

I walked into the Nag's Head to sustinate my belly,
Fit crack in the corner, but I knew its cunt was smelly
Smelled of rotting fish heads and old and crispy sick,
She said her name was Charlotte and she wanted to suck my dick.
She's the type of crack that you've heard about, the sort they call infamous,
Peroxide hair, dead long legs, and bog paper stuck to her anus.
I thought: 'Ay lad, times is hard, and its nearly closing time,
I'll put a bag on her head, and a peg on my nose,
I'll grummidge through the slime.
Charlotte is the biggest slag in Macc,
She'll do anything to get you in the sack,
With her legs spread wide, she opens up her trap,
Spends her life just lying on her back.

We walked along up Buxton Road, strolled along the Cut, she said:
'Give us an inch, and I'll take a yard!'
I slammed her half a foot.
I got my hand up her skirt, coz I'm a Macc Lad, I knew just what to do,
I got my hand inside, I got my arm inside,
I lost it right up to my tattoo.

Charlotte is the biggest slag in Macc,
Her legs spread wide, she opens up her trap
Coffee, sex and johnny bags come free,
So do crabs, AIDS, herpes and VD.

We ended up at her place, I waded through the johnnies,
She put another notch in her bedstead, while I watched The Two Ronnies

Charlotte is the biggest slag in Macc,
She spends her life just lying on her back,
She's always got to take the upper hand,
You are what you drink,
I'm a bitter man.



N.B.- 'The Two Ronnies'- an alleged comedy show of the 1970s featuring a fat talentless twat
        called Ronald, and small talentless twit called Ronald.

N.B.- 'Herpes'- the top venereal disease of the early 1980s.
        Along came AIDS and fucked it off. Poor old herpes.