this careless kiss
cotton-mouthed
closed-lipped sky
mercy or pity,
cracked open door
to curl itself
against my horizon
another shade of blue
and caution
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Mary asked me to help with the judging - so here I am.
A nice tight piece of writing this - and so very thought-provoking. I liked this...so much in these nine lines...
~ Nicolette
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I liked everything said here...most of all! everything else I thought after reading it...and still I hunger more...
Mal
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cotton mouth
close lipped sky is a wonderful line set inside a very nice piece of poetry-
m -
"cotton-mouthed
closed-lipped sky"
vivid yet crisp imagery. wonderfully done my friend. The mixture of realization within words is well done.
Thanks for sharing and keep writing.
VIRGOAN
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Wonderful!
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Seems like you and I were on the same page when thinking of blue doors Love, C
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if you mix blue and caution, it becomes green~ the color of new beginnings, hope, and promise.
I loved this.
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Very nice It is a sort of short and punchy poem, really enjoyed it. The last two lines esp. Good luck in the contest
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Like butter...
"this careless kiss
cotton-mouthed
closed-lipped sky"
Bluesy Feel, Scribe.
~ Nicky♥
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I like this! It rings with an echo of sadness...
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