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Montage

Tissue paper skies, crepe mornings
eye brows, gull wings
torn from dreams and fantasy:
decoupage heart pasted,
re-tasted. Teases the palate --
until, the yearning begins.

All the waves, marching,
the assault upon stone:
everything runs through
the sieve of fingers.

Smiles, a hesitant hi;
the half veiled eyes, looking up --
forgiveness is a price for love.

Clouds race
washing shadows
across the face.

Motivation: a lock on the hope chest.
Keys: revelation promised.

Tissue paper skies
hopes beat under the translucent
skin of fears,  dusted with innocent
white lies across the glow of truth.

It is easy to hide

in

“I love you.”


3:27 PM
12/04/07
Alexandria, VA

Author notes

Option 2: I tried to unveil your secrets
but you managed to erase my efforts
with avowed lies of love

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 24 of 24

  • XXCrimsonRaineXX
    January 5, 2008

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    beautifully written

    another amazing poem. the word choice was excellent. i especially loved the lines

    Tissue paper skies
    hopes beat under the translucent
    skin of fears, dusted with innocent
    white lies across the glow of truth.

    excellent write. keep up the good work.


    • tomisb
      January 5, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      More than one amazing poem you will swell my ego and make me burst with visions of pride.

      Thanks for enjoying this one. It is truly one of my more abstract poems created to tease, seduce and get the reader caught in the clouds that flee over head.

      I am glad you gleaned a deeper sense from the words than most. I think from what little bit I have seen, that you have the heart of an artist and are doomed to caring more that most can hear.

      Love, Tom B.


  • poetryality silver member
    December 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Your opening metaphors are written with the tenderness of a mother's touch. I simply love the first line of this well executed work of word-play Tomis. Splendid! You rounded this work off with expertise. The last line is the clincher! "I love you" is often passed around like the wine bottle at a party in my youth.

    Your take on the prompt is excellent! I felt these words Tomis and hurt knowing that you know this quote so well. I realize that this hurt must have been in a past relationship for I know the greatness of the present one. What a wonderful take on the prompt, I say again... Excellent!

    Thank you for this magical entry. I wish you the best in life and this Comp.


    Always ♥

    Renee


    • tomisb
      December 10, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I would have no life if I had not climbed up and down the ladder of love many times. Glad you enjoyed my pastiche of abstactractions and fluttering songs.
      Love, Tom B.


  • darell
    December 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Mesmerising.

    The depth of your words is captivating.
    So much wisdom and truth painted on the
    canvas of the mind with eloquence.
    One could read this piece over and over
    and still walk away with some new revelation.
    A montage of artistic excellence!


    • tomisb
      December 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for finding so much here. It is a gift to any artist when they feel they have been heard and savored.
      I wanted to play with nuances and abstractions. It is nice to find someone enjoy the reverberations created.
      Peace & Light
      Tom B.


  • Hope Angel silver member
    December 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    good job... you paint the picture very well
    Jade


    • tomisb
      December 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks. I just wanted to catch how fragile our connection to the truth is when we are dancing with the angel called love.
      Love, Tom B.


  • ellipsist
    December 8, 2007

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    wonderful closing... such truth to the lines with which you have chosen to end this piece...

    saddening... but that may be just my interpretation...

    beautifully composed!


    • tomisb
      December 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      It is sad. I admit, I rarely write dark and this is only a shadow. I used abstractions and the feel of tissue paper and torn out pictures from other sources to decorate our own to create the feeling of how much our little stories catch up with us. This at best is perhaps only a cautionary tale. Slowly but surely, I think I am getting better at my abstractions.
      Love, Tom B.


  • Quill
    December 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Care to tell me what this is about?
    I read but it meant nothing to me,just a series of jumbled sentences.


    • tomisb
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Yah know that is a problem. I like poetry cause it can be a collage of images that create meaning because of the relationships that grow both from the image and the relationships between images. If I had wanted to write a prose piece about how we use bits and pieces of ourselves to show other people who we are without really ever showing who we are I would have written a psycological treatsie. As ee cummings said when asked what his poems meant: "Read the poem"

      Unfortuantely, not all his poems sing for me or create any meaning in my brain or heart. I guess this falls into this group for you. That is why there are so many artists in this world. We all create a language and it translates gloriously for some, but not for everyone. Nobodys fault, just one of those facts of life.

      Thanks for asking. I appreciate the imput.

      Peace & Light
      Tom B.


      • Quill
        December 7, 2007

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        Thanks for your fast and polite reply, I'm scratching my head though(may be I have fleas) or just too uneducated


        • tomisb
          December 7, 2007
          Edit | Reply
          First line - nothing but blue skies and clouds with a little kid drawing feeling perhaps
          eye brows and gull wings, when we draw the two arches to make a pencil statement of gulls in flight are they not two eyebrows
          decopage heart -- have you not seen the boxes done in decopage
          the tasting, ah do not colors have taste and does not the taste anothers heart become and intimate memory one that makes you ache for more.

          Waves turn stone to sand and water and sand run through fingers. Back to the first image and also a feeling about how nothing lasts and all is ephemeral. Another pastiche, torn image on the decoupage heart.

          This stanza initmates that at times the heart is torn and then the one who has hurt it apologizes in that way you can' t refuse and the arguement about hurt, harm and forgiveness and isn't it different when it is someone you love. This is a full paper of a thought but you get the drift.

          Now this is a reference back to the first lines and a statement about how there are good times and bad times on any sunny day or in any love which also is picture on the decoupage heart and a reference back to the verse above.

          Complete reference to the decoupage heart but also hope chests and dowerys and what does drive us to unite with someone and are there other motivations beside love and are they not sometimes the greater force. Think co-dependent or other addictive relationships, think greed -- money.

          Now repeating tissue paper skies completes the loop and it is a dark cast when we find that the truth is hidden by lies, even innocent (?) ones. we get confused when we hope and are afraid at the same time and refuse to see the contradictions.
          '
          The last three lines about the three little words being a hiding place for a multitude of sins. Well I thought I was being blatant and almost banal. Thanks for letting me know I wasn't. There are similarites between this and the poem of yours I reviewed. I know you are more comfortable with your version, you should be you wrote it. But does this give some insight into the unity and commonality of theme.

          I wouldn't normally do this, 'cause I am an arrogant snot, just like most artist. But there was something in the way you came across and in the person I saw between the bars of his lines of poetry that made me feel this was worth a shot.

          Peace & Light
          Tom B.







  • Star Shine
    December 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I love the images that play to the senses, your creative descriptions work together flawlessly.


    • tomisb
      December 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I was in PA, Chambersburg to be exact, just last Tuesday.

      Glad you enjoyed this piece. I was playing with a different way to construct the metaphor and respond to the prompt. I am basically a sensualist and a romantic in my writings. Thanks again.

      Love, Tom B.


  • micol
    December 5, 2007

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    Perfect title for this nicely integrated sequence of images...all leading to meaning and substance. The longer stanzas especially create an enjoyable reading cadence that carries the voice from word to word. Nicely handled.


    • tomisb
      December 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for letting me know how the structure carried you through the vageries of my thoughts. it is good to know that the song hidden in the dance of the words is strong enough.

      Love, Tom B.


  • LaMerci
    December 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Love

    Can be tricky but this write is not villany, it's is a
    calliope of honest and sometimes unfavorable levels
    that we lack in displays of love. Thanks Tom


    • tomisb
      December 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      In the dusty patchwork of a half clown morning, do we not want to wake to the full loving hug of "I really care" It is not there and so we motor on. Again we take up our dreams and tell the world that someone is going to come along and dance with us. Just us. All the magic -- ours. When we believe, we never want to come down to the sad facts, the truth our teeth tell us as we bite down.

      Love, Tom B.


  • Ithica silver member
    December 5, 2007

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    Sometimes I think people get used say "I love you" as a blanket statement that covers all situations. When it is reduced to being a band-aid, is it any wonder people mistrust the word and consequently the emotions? Hmmmmmmm...


    • tomisb
      December 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Language is only there to reflect what we know in action. When our words sing sweet, clear and true -- we know how deeply it touches us. Unfortunately, we have learned that most words, at best, are half full of dreams and the rest failed intentions. We learn we are best served is we let the words lay harmlessly at our doorstep.

      Still, there are times, . . . there are times when, we want every word to be full and wrap our dreams with a chance of realization. We watch these words and know it will break our heart if we open them and find they are empty.

      Love, Tom B.


  • rose petal desires
    December 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    you blew the perfect story out here
    best wishes

    your fam
    rose


    • tomisb
      December 6, 2007
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      It's faxs that I can blow on the sax the long slow wail of my tale with some frail quail. In the land of sin and crime, I can only wipe away the grime, serve my time in line after line and let the pain come out of the words to touch the sores in other hearts and minds.

      Thanks for telling me I touched gold and sold you this tale with out having to lay out the whole truth in flaming regalia.

      Love, Tom B.

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