What is love?
Is love shown in bruises?
All over my body I see them...
What is love?
Is it heard in screaming?
All I can hear is that I am wrong...
What is love?
Is it felt in a quick slap?
All I can feel is the hand that hits me...
What is love?
Is it tasted in blood?
All I can taste is the warm thick...
What is love?
Is it scented in sweat and blood?
All I can smell is the body fluid as I sit silent...
Author notes
This was written about how I have been treated and I wanted to get some of my feelings out.
Author name- maria y ivan
- The Commenting Community group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Silence by KnightOfTheRose.
375 points, ended December 20, 2007, 34 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter your best prewrite. by Anguas-Confusion.
525 points, ended June 27, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - that don't impress me much by j-ay rose.
600 points, ended April 9, 2008, 40 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 31 of 31
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You know from personal experience what love is not. Your intense feelings scream from every line. That said the poem itself would have been more interesting if it was not so repetitive. It sounds more like a primer for an abuse class than a well scripted verse. I think you could have conveyed the same pain and outrage in a more poetic form that shows the reader instead of merely telling her.
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thank you for your entry.
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Well that is definitely not love. None of those things come close to what real love is. You did a good job with your expression, I know it can't be easy, but writing is therapy. Keep it up
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Very strong and very worthwhile putting the thoughts and emotions of the situation into words. If writing this poem helps no-one other than yourself, it has already done it's job.
Good write.
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Oh yeah and its not being the controller you can love and show concern but never think that you have to be the one to boss the other around.... I hope everyone understand what I am saying ok thanks
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What is love yeah this has been asked and asked over the years. Love is not beating someone or feeling the blood rush out I know that much. Great write though I just hope that one day everyone will have love in there life . Love is a wonderful thing but its not this way ... thanks for the share
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HEART-WRENCHING!!!!!!!
This is sadly so true for so many. I must admit I was caught up in this with my ex-wife and it took many years after I left to find myself again.
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Wow! This was heartbreaking. I'm sorry for what you've been through but I can assure you that is not love. Congrats on the trophy!
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wow this has got so much emotion in and i can relate if we are not taught about love what it truly it we know no differant and think abuse is love then we find it hard to let any one in to trust
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makes me sad
hope you realize that this is not love....love is kind and doesn't hurt....but the best love is love for oneself....love yourself to fleace yourself from beast like this....i feel your emotion in this poem
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Extremely powerful
quite true for some and I gotta say that I think the background was an excellent choice for this it seems to intertwine with the poem itself. -
Very Powerful!
I liked the question and answer format of this poem. Good structure. The sheer honesty and candor of this poem give it a great deal of power. Well done.
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So many hidden secrets in there... Sometimes writing is the only way to express them, I know. Thank you so much for adding it to my contest, I enjoyed reading it, you have got quite a talent. The very best of luck to you. keep up the good penning. xXx
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No one deserves this kind of abuse and just writing about it must mean you are experiencing something this is not very good. Time to get out, and give yourself some time to get over this kind of treatment. On does not want to jump from the frying pan into the fire, as they say, but give things time to cool down. Sentiments well expressed in these lines.
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Nice job on this, it was sad and beautifully written. Thank you for entering! Excellent work and the best of luck in my contest!
-Steve- -
No one should be treated as such. Get out!! This is far from love. I know, I too lived in your poem once upon a time ago.
TD
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I hope this is not a recent occurrence.
Get yourself free.
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oh my god. this is a great poem. i can really feel your pain. and it's a good thing that you can write about it, and i hope you can get over those bad feelings and out of the bad situation.
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Writing is always a great escape and expunger of feeling.
There are abuse groups on allpoetry if you are interested in talking, sharing, etc. If you want things to change I feel you'll need to become proactive. . .seek help or assistance, instead of absorbing the hits.
Think about it, at least, then take the next step in your decisive life.
-Steve
OH! In my head, the poem may stick out better if the answers had a return before and after.
As example:
"What is love?"
"Is love shown in bruises?"
"All over my body I see them..."
"What is love?"
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Thank you for your comment, I might just do that with the poem, maybe it will make the flow better, lately I have been having a lot of trouble keeping flow.
~Alix
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YOU NEED HELP!!! seriously.. if ur note is true there is help for u.. its ur choice to choose the love u want
well about the write.. i liked how you expresses the mecloncholy in love,, fussion of pain in it
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Thank you for your comment.
~Alix -
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Aww, I'll be sure to remedy that.
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get the fuck away from that little piece of shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you don't deserve that. I wasn't the best boyfriend when I was with you, but I never imagined you'd go to someone worse. I don't want to find your name in the obits.
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I just need someone, and it's not like anyone is going to treat me nice anyway... So, I guess this is the best I'm going to get and who am I going to talk to if I don't have him? I have no one else, I mean, Stacy won't even talk to me because she's a pregnant pothead who won't stop smoking and drinking to save her life. I just need a friend basically, you know what I mean right?
~Alix
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Wow, this is some deep shit. Our feelings always bring out the best poetry. I hope one day love can nurture you rather than hurt you, just so you can see the other side of the two faced emotion.
~Lia
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Thank you for your comment I really appreciate it.
~Alix
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I hope you find joy in love someday. You've had your fair dose of sorrow.
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Wow, I haven't heard from you in forever, thanks for your comment... I miss your comments.
~Alix
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Well Expressed.
It's so sad, the way so many have let others take control over them.. You need to know that you're someone who is special, and deserves to be treated as such. Damn those who have you thinking anything less.
Much love sweet soul.
-Timothy aka poeticweaver~
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Thank you for your comment, I really liked it. I thank you for your encouragement.
~Alix
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