Simple days with
geisha flowers
imprinted on the
wall;
Beauties of the
naked eye shine
with cosmic lust.
Granite smiles of
a tequila stupor
bombard the hearts
with false joy.
Latent minds of
raddled souls wait
to spill the the tears,
because giesha girls
have only time for the
next open wallet.
Author notes
I would really like to know how the last stanza sounds
A contest entry
- Just Give Me Something To Read by HerbalGoat.
300 points, ended January 18, 2008, 89 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
hmm... not quite the style i like so i really can't speak much for that.. but it is well written, flows well and sounds great! Keep up the great vocabulary!
Candace -
another nice write I think the last stanza sounds fine it conveys a thought in itsself
-
Just wonderful writing here. I love this too. The imagery really stands out. This piece is short yet very well-written indeed. Keep it up.
All the best
Wayne
Adding your comment:
