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I am Drawn

Missing image

Alone you lay
forsaken by the dreams
you almost... believed

staring out, an empty window
wondering
where the time has gone

where you left, your heart

wishing and waiting
for your prince to appear
the one you knew, as a child

yet in your mind
lies a thousand thoughts
covering you, in a warm embrace

waking the life, you crave

offering in plush flesh
the beauty you hold within
savored, for some far fathomed love

lingering in your despair
hidden beneath a calm repose
pressing passion, cries for release

to be taken in love... once more

yet alone you lay
forsaken by the dreams
you almost... believed

staring out, an empty window
wondering alone
where the time has gone

where you left, your heart

 

somewhere in the clouds

the place

where I am drawn

 

 

 

 

Lee

Author notes

Sorry, I just could not create much Erotica out of that picture, more sadness and searching

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 30 of 30

  • Loveandblessings2u gold member
    December 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This said that I already comment on this piece,
    but I honestly don't remember. But I won't go back and look, I am trying to be fair here. Having such a hard time. LoL


  • Loveandblessings2u gold member
    December 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    First I would like to ask you to please not 5 star my comment or comment me back at all, at this time. I am trying very hard not to find out who anyone is at this time.

    Your poem is about as beautiful as can be.
    A bit sad, yyet very lovely.
    Your wording is so soft and tender,

    "yet alone you lay
    forsaken by the dreams
    you almost... believed"

    That's pretty deep, heartfelt, touching.
    This is avery enjoyable piece of poetry.

    Thanks for entering my contest and good luck.

    Loveandblessings2u & yours always
    Joyce


  • ScarletO gold member
    December 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, you are so good at writing these love poems. Perhaps you feel drawn but I feel drawn too as I read this. Congratulations on your gold winnings. You definitely deserve it and I can see why the hostess chose yours as the winning poem.


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 9, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Scarlet


      When ever I read you name
      I always think of Red Buttler and Scarlet Ohara... lol
      I must have watched the movie toooooo0 many times
      Thank you for seeing the Gold
      Pleased you cared for my words

      Rick


  • BeautifulFlame
    December 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Well this tuged at my heart, its so different than the normal that i have to say wow!
    I have felt this picture didnt expect it to affect me this way when i read it.
    you seen into the pictures soul even though i said erotic you took it to a very special unique level.
    Congrats this one is Gold!


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 9, 2007

      Edit | Reply

      Hi Lisa


      I read many of the other entries
      I saw much I liked, in the words you gathered here
      You are kind to give me Gold
      I believe you realy read the thoughts in this well
      I thank you

      Rick


  • snowbird600
    December 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    An Empty Window

    You wrote this very well Rick. Thank you for sending this. I can very much relate to this. I think we all can.
    Thanks again for your kind words. Sorry I missed your call. I must have been resting.
    Love
    Steff-


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Stef


      I thought you may like these words
      We do relate to this well
      I will try to call when you are feeling better
      Thank you for reading me

      Rick


  • trista gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Hi Rick,

    I think this is one of the best things you have written in a long time, my friend. Perhaps one of my all time favorites, in fact, and among your many beautiful and inspiring poems, that's saying quite a bit.

    The emotion in this is very fitting to the picture, yet the poem stands on its own even without the graphic. I would not call this "erotica" by any means, yet it does carry a soft and sensual tone that I loved. One line for you to look at:
    "savored, for some far fathom love" I think you may want "far fathomed".

    I can't even tell you why I'm so drawn to this poem, but it really hit a note inside me. The ending is perfect, and a total surprise from what I expected.

    Great work hun. I will be adding this to my list of favorites.

    Love and s
    ~J.
    P.S. Good luck in the contest.


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Dear Julie


      How is my AP Wife
      Love when you add my writing to your favorites
      I like this, it does not exceed "Forever and a Day" or "I Will"
      It does express somthing we all reach for sometime in life
      to be raised up and loved completely, felt in a wish

      Thank you for being my Spelling Fairy, and liking my ending, (I tried several) Rick


  • genevieve3
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    sadness in the forsaken, not all is forsaken. I would like to hold the subject and say "this to shall pass, you are not forsaken. there will come a time when you are found".


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Genevieve


      I think you felt deeply
      for the woman in my words

      This is the best we can do in poetry
      have you care for our thoughts

      Thank you for reading me, Rick


  • SummerlandRayne gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I looked at this contest earlier and thought she looked a bit more in sadness and longing than in the throws of desire. Your words fit more my feeling of her emotional state of being as well. Very nice verse that shows great compassion. Best of luck!

    Blessings~
    Sue


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Sue


      I must have not outgrown my hippy stage, I have my own path
      Nice that you agree, the body laugage was mixed as I see it.

      Thank you for seeing compassion

      Rick


  • Jalalbad gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Good luck in contest

    You have the rare ability to read hearts. You could have read mine -this almost fits me. Though I know you never, I am not that close to you. Just love reading your poetry to see what you will come up with next.
    smile,
    Judy


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Judy


      Nice that you follow my poetry
      Thank you for clarfying how close we are... lol
      I appreate your intrest in my words

      Rick


  • michellemybelle gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I am crying...
    this is lovely, words I and I am sure many relate to. I love how this is about deep feelings of grief and dissappointment yet also dreamy, especially the ending and looking out the window, as I know I when feeling like this, find myself, between searching inward for answeres, looking out the window at the world, protected by my walls, and wish.
    I see perhaps you are a bit the same.
    I think you captured this picture very well, good luck in this contest.
    love
    Michelle


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sweet Michelle


      I want to move people with my words
      but not to tears
      Thank you for feeling this so closely
      I know you understand

      Rick


  • debilynn gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    a beautiful write filled with deep emotions. well set with the photo. as usual, you have the words that touch the soul. thank you for sharing this. keep writing! God bless you always


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Debilynn


      Thank you for saying I touch the soul
      Pleased the words match the picture
      I thank you my friend

      Rick


  • SilverButterfly gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is exactly how I saw this picture and what I imagined it would portray to the viewer. Your imagination blows my mind,great job!!!

    GBY
    SilverButterfly

    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Butterfly


      We must think alike
      this is what came to me
      I thank you

      Rick


  • ravensgift
    December 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful. 'forsaken by the dreams you almost... believed'


  • ears2hearyou gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    beautiful and tenderly written

    really dug deep to express the anguish and longing for
    love. Strong words for a heart reaching, breaking thru
    for the love of his life to enter his heart......
    have you ever considered that this "tension" has come to
    you for a reason? to make you more open and able to
    hear the life of your life's voice....???
    I am seeing some powerful writes come out of you ...
    great! that's all we need you getting better at this!
    that was just a tickle of green envy!
    So I return tenderly the words you shared with me...
    I believe in you dear poet...I believe in you!
    ears2hearyou
    Kathleen you are stuggling powerfully!
    I am so damn proud of you! and deeply inspired
    too!


  • zachsgirl
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Made me feel sad and kind of lonely , the picture really go's with it.All and all I like it very much.


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      zachsgirl


      Thank you for reading this
      I appreate your thoughts in this

      Thank you for the applause

      Rick


  • Hikari Lady
    December 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    It's so beautiful and sad I love the opening too, nice describtion for the picture.


    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      DramaLady


      Nice of you to read me
      Pleased the words matched the picture
      we all see somthing different

      Thank you for saying beautiful

      Rick


  • Loveandblessings2u gold member
    December 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "Alone you lay
    forsaken by the dreams
    you almost... believed,"

    this is the most beautiful opening
    i ever read, i just love this part.

    "somewhere in the clouds

    the place

    where I am drawn"

    your ending is simply amazing,
    so very beautiful.

    perfect poetry, my friend.

    loveandblessings2u & yours always
    joyce



    • Endeavor gold member
      December 7, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Joyce


      I realy struggled with this picture
      To me, nakid does not necessarly mean erotic
      I just could not make that connection
      More... I saw the whole picture and felt dispair

      Thank you for liking my words

      Rick

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